Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

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Old Jan 27th, 2012, 03:36 PM   #1
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Default Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

Hello!

I have been falsely accused of stalking. My ex-girlfriend, who is actually a married woman, has accused me of stalking her. I honestly believe she was coerced into claiming or filing such a claim, but that's beside the point.

The story is this:

The last time we met was just before the new years. She had been staying with her family during that time in Florence OR, and told me that she has decided to move away to Texas in order to "figure out her life." She told me this when we met approximately 3 days before the new years, we spent the night together, exchanged "sentimental gifts" and said our good-byes. I was also pressing her into getting a divorce, she was already separated.

A couple of hours before the meet, I received a text message from her husband telling me that he has let her go. Yes, her husband knew about me.

At our meet, she asked me if she could call me once a week, just to keep in touch while she is in Texas, and I agreed.

Anyway, I got fed up with her bull**** and wanted to talk to her in order to stop the calls and ask her where I can send the ring she gave me. I couldn't get a hold of her, so I contacted some of her family members and asked them to tell her to contact me. Her brother who lives in Texas responded to me saying that she never actually was in Texas, that she was staying with her husbands family in Florence. You can imagine how upset I was when I learned of this, and it didn't take me a lot of thinking to realize that her husband actually "sent her to me," to tell me, to lie to me. I don't know if he told her to have sex with me, but she did. Twice.

I do not understand how somebody can do something like that, go to a different town and have sex with somebody other than your husband with your husbands partnership or understanding. It is just sick. Disgusting!

Anyway, when I learned of this, I wanted to contact her to tell her what a manipulative, lying ***** she is. In my attempts to try to contact her, she has filed a "stalkers" complaint against me.

It is true that I have tried to contact her, but I had a good reason to. I was mad, and upset.


Yesterday I was contacted by Florence Police Department and told not to contact her at all. Of course, all this happened after I sent her husband text messages telling them what sickos they are. Once I did this, I had no more reason to talk to her or him or anybody from that family.

Anyway, how can this be a justified stalking order? I called back the Florence Police Dept. and he said that it's only a "complaint." That if I stay away, nothing will go on my record or anything. I am still confused as to whether complaint was filed and judge was seen. In either case, it's completely unjustified.


What can I do? She lives in a different city than I do, I will not drive 300 miles to appeal the order (if there is such a thing), let alone drive that long for the ***** herself.
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Old Jan 27th, 2012, 04:02 PM   #2
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Default re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

Just stay away
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Old Jan 27th, 2012, 05:39 PM   #3
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Default re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

Stay away. You have no criminal or civil action pending to respond to, no reason to contact either one of them -- to tell them you are "mad"?

The more distance you put between these two and hopefully, never see or hear of either one of them, the better off you will be.

As to hooking up with someone "separated", hopefully you have learned a valuable lesson. The ink should be long dry on the divorce papers if you don't want to entangled in such a mess again.
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Old Jan 27th, 2012, 06:01 PM   #4
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Default re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

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Stay away. You have no criminal or civil action pending to respond to, no reason to contact either one of them -- to tell them you are "mad"?
Not tell them that I am "mad", mad is a state of mind. I wanted to call her to tell her that she's a lying manipulative wh0re! That I no longer want anything to do with her.

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The more distance you put between these two and hopefully, never see or hear of either one of them, the better off you will be.

As to hooking up with someone "separated", hopefully you have learned a valuable lesson. The ink should be long dry on the divorce papers if you don't want to entangled in such a mess again.
Yes, a valuable lesson it was. I will certainly not be contacting either one of them ever again. I do have the the ring her dead mother gave her. I would throw it away, but unlike her - I do have a sense of sanctity. I don't think it'd be right to throw it away, regardless of her shameful actions. If she ends up wanting it - all she needs to do is tell me the address to mail it to.

I will be throwing away her panties, though.
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Old Apr 27th, 2012, 02:19 PM   #5
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Default Re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

RUN! You have no idea how lucky you are!

I recently went through something similar. We communicated by text. I found out she was cheating on me with a married coworker. She had some of my things she would not give back. She said she would at her own time and not to contact her. Of course I didnt know to do so was a crime.
3 counts telephonic Harassment. I was arrested and spent 3 days in jail. Trial pending.
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Old Apr 27th, 2012, 02:22 PM   #6
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Default Re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

BTW- I have no criminal record and was never violent or threatening. She even stated so in the complaint/ police report. My texts were pleasant and conversational.
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Old Apr 27th, 2012, 07:03 PM   #7
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Default Re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

Leave her alone. If you continue to contact her, she will have all she needs to get you charged with stalking. Move on!!!
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Old Apr 27th, 2012, 09:15 PM   #8
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Not tell them that I am "mad", mad is a state of mind. I wanted to call her to tell her that she's a lying manipulative wh0re! That I no longer want anything to do with her.
How quaint.

Mad is a "state of mind" but you have to be in such a state of mind to want to call someone and tell them what you claim you wanted to tell her. You can argue the minute details all you want, but you were mad and you let it be known.

Just move on with your life. She's married. It's over.
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Old Apr 28th, 2012, 08:54 PM   #9
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Default Re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

Well, as odd as it may seem, SHE contacted me to apologize. She said her "husband" was forcing her to do those things, but she never actually filed anything. She just called the cops and asked them to tell me not to contact her.

Even "oddlier" is the fact that we've stayed in contact, and she said she is leaving her husband very soon.

Of course, this time I will not be there. She will end up alone. A little lesson from little ol' me.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 05:15 PM   #10
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Default Re: Falsely accused of stalking by my ex-girlfriend

I responded to your issue some time ago. My ex GF who was having an affair with a co-worker.

FYI- I was convicted of one of three counts and in appeal. I've learned alot since me unfortunate turn of events.
I will pass along some knowledge for you or whomever reads this. These lessons cost me 3 days in jail and thousands of dollars in court costs and legal fees.

Due to the media and the occasional guy who looses his mind and commits horrible acts of domestic violence the Justice system and society is now hypersensitive. In domestic Violence cases, as man you will be found guilty until proven innocent. An example of this is ORS 133.055 2. Basically if the police get involved and one party of a relationship feels fearful, you will be arrested. Its a mandatory arrest policy.

In my case I was arrested for telephonic harassment. I was texting asking for money owed. No threats no violence, just pleasant conversation. No criminal record, no warning, no investigation.

Furthermore the police will arrest you to avoid liability, (just in case you are that crazy guy) the DA will prosecute to avoid political liability, and the judge will do the same. Domestic Violence is a loaded term with a huge and ugly stigma. Once your accused presumption of innocence seems to go out the window.

There's a lot of crazy and vindictive women out there who know how to abuse the system. They now have a lot of power over the men they are in relationships with.
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