Landlord asking for $17,000

I got myself into a bit of finacial trouble and moved out of my apartment owing my landlord $5,000 ( back rent and late fees). there were also some minor damages. my daughter had drawn on a small portion of a bedroom wall and the carpet needed cleaned. Now this man is trying to tell me I owe him $17,000 dollars. (yet for some reason isnt taking me to court over it)Since I moved out I have seen the inside of that appartment as my best friend lives right above it. This landlord replaced all the carpet...but not with the same cheap appartment carpet that was there when I lived there...he put in burber. He also put in a new refridgorator and stove...even though he had put new appliances in when I first moved in less then a year and a half ago. he also replaced all the kitchen cabbinets and the kitchens backsplash. He also replaced all the bedroom doors and a few other repairs and modifications. I dont know what to do. I know I owe this man money...but not that much! I think he is trying to con me out of paying for all he did to remodle this appartment! I mean who else in there right mind would let a tenant rack up $17,000 and not even take them to court over it...is he trying to pull a fast one?

[OHlandlord]

Did he send you a statement of the dispostion of your seposit? An itemized bill for the amount he stated? If not, tell him you want an itemized bill to show what you owe and why. Once you receive that, you can dispute each item on the bill that you do not owe for.

You will owe for back rent, interest on it if a judgement has been granted against you, advertising and utilities if you broke your lease to move out, and damages to the unit (cleaning costs, and the depreciated value of anything that needed to be replaced).

Send him a written letter asking for the itemized bill before you pay it. Mail this to him by certified mail, return receipt requested, and keep a copy of this. Post back here once you receive an actual bill and a list of charges.

I have asked him for an itemized reciept...still I have seen nothing! Since we moved out he hasnt even made any attempt to contact us. the only reason we found out about this is because he stopped us while visiting my friend that lives upstairs from the appartment we were living in. Also my mother was on the lease as a co-signer and so he had her personal information. She just informed me that the landlord has been calling her...yet never mentioning anything about the money owed...he has called to talk about me and my husband...telling her that he thinks I made a mistake marrying him...hes not a good provider...that he thinks my husband doesnt take good care of me and may even be abusive...he has no right to be talking about us in that way...those things arent even true and even if they were how are they any business of his...i really think somthing fishy is going on here.

[OHlandlord]

Do not ASK for an itemized receipt. Send him a letter requesting a copy within 10 days of the disposition sheet for your deposit and an itemization of the charges against you. Send this to him by certified mail, return receipt requested, and keep a copy for yourself. (This provides proof that you mailed it and that he received it.)

How long ago did you move out? State law gives the LL a time limit during which he MUST send you this paperwork. Please tell me the date you moved out and returned the keys and what state you are in and I can tell you his time limit. In some states, if he fails to meet this time limits, he forfeits all charges against you. In some states, if a LL does not meet this deadline and acts in bad faith, he can be made to return to you 3 x the deposit amount.