I reported husband for child abuse...

After reporting child abuse to the police my husband was arrested at the work place and CPS has come to help me and I guess monitor us. I just don't want a divorce or legal separation. She says that I need to extend the restraining order in order to appear protective of my children. Can I grant him visitation rights yet without alarming CPS? The court has him on a probation and he is still on a restraining order from the court. Can I ask for chaperoned counseling for us without appearing unprotective of children? I am scared to ask them because they document everything and twist your words around a lot of times. I want to do what they require but nothing more. My goal is to get marriage counseling with my husband and monitor his progress with anger management and parenting class in a safe environment. Ineed financial help from him but I don't want to get a legal separation in order to get it. Besides they said it takes a year for us to get the money from child support.

Originally Posted by Jaz

After reporting child abuse to the police my husband was arrested at the work place and CPS has come to help me and I guess monitor us. I just don't want a divorce or legal separation. She says that I need to extend the restraining order in order to appear protective of my children. Can I grant him visitation rights yet without alarming CPS? The court has him on a probation and he is still on a restraining order from the court. Can I ask for chaperoned counseling for us without appearing unprotective of children? I am scared to ask them because they document everything and twist your words around a lot of times. I want to do what they require but nothing more. My goal is to get marriage counseling with my husband and monitor his progress with anger management and parenting class in a safe environment. Ineed financial help from him but I don't want to get a legal separation in order to get it. Besides they said it takes a year for us to get the money from child support.

Has CPS initiated a parenting plan for your husband?
Usually that's what they'll do, they give the alleged abuser a list of things they must do- such as counseling, anger management courses, and alot of other things.

Talk to the CPS caseworker, explain that you want to protect your kids first, and at the same time get help for your husband and also work towards a supervised visitation possibilty. Alot of it will depend on what the abuse was and how much of a danger he presents to the children.

I agree that it would be good for you to request that the restraining order be continued on a temporary basis pending the outcome of CPS's parenting plan. You can also request that limited SUPERVISED vistation be ordered.

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Has CPS initiated a parenting plan for your husband?
Usually that's what they'll do, they give the alleged abuser a list of things they must do- such as counseling, anger management courses, and alot of other things.

Talk to the CPS caseworker, explain that you want to protect your kids first, and at the same time get help for your husband and also work towards a supervised visitation possibilty. Alot of it will depend on what the abuse was and how much of a danger he presents to the children.

I agree that it would be good for you to request that the restraining order be continued on a temporary basis pending the outcome of CPS's parenting plan. You can also request that limited SUPERVISED vistation be ordered.

Also, what state are you in? Some states allow for court orders for CS without having to file for a seperation or divorce.

I am in california. Also The CPS worker is not giving me any information on the case. She is not even giving me straightforward guidelines as to what we need to do to reconcile the family. She just keeps pushing me to get TROs and saying that if I don't I'll appear unprotective and have my children taken away. I went to the court to do that today. I was trying to get a TRO where we could have communication with each other. However after signing the papers and getting the judge to sign them I got my copy and discovered that there were boxes checked that I hadn't checked off. The box where we can't have communications was checked off and I never checked it off. It wasn't checked before I signed it. The lady doing my paper work acted biased against my husband as well. While I was telling her what happened she mentioned she wanted to leave out part of my story. It was the part where my husband laid down with the baby and comforted her. She also told me that if I tried to get a restraining order just from the kids and not me then CPS would take my kids! Is this true or am I being fooled. I saw a sign in the lobby afterwards saying that they are not legally allowed to give legal advice. She just did!

What was the abuse that caused you to report your husband?
Have there been previous reports or incidents of abuse?

he slapped our daughter after he couldn't deal with her crying. She got a mark. There were no other instances of abuse.

Originally Posted by Unregistered

he slapped our daughter after he couldn't deal with her crying. She got a mark. There were no other instances of abuse.

You really do need an attorney. I know that they are expensive, but either the whole story isn't being told, or the caseworker AND Judge are in the wrong. Either way, you'll need an attorney to get it straightened out.

If you don't have much money you can try legal aid, or try to find one who is willing to let you make payments.

Legal aid said they don't deal with family law. And no one I know of has offered me the opportunity to make payments. Do you have any lists or resources for attorneys that might allow payments?

Nice, the same dead silence I get from all the other attorneys who just told me to go to legal aid or somewhere else. So this is it? I am on my own huh. There is no one left on this earth that seems to have any concern with his fellow man unless tragedy strikes near their own heart. Sorry mine's isn't worth any one's time.