What are the laws regarding an ex- spouse claiming alimony while cohabitating?

My husband is still paying alimony 9 years after his divorce due to the fact that his ex-wife has crones. His ex-wife has been living common law with her boyfriend for the past couple of years and has invested in her boyfriend's home from the division of assets from the family home. She has put a suite in her boyfriend's house which she claims to be living in, she is also using a separate address from her boyfriend's in order to continue alimony. My husband tried to discuss an end date to the alimony with her, but, she does not want to discuss the ending of alimony and therefore enrolled him with family maintenance to stop any further discussion.

She had said at one time that alimony would stop once the last child completed high school, it has now been three years since the last child graduated. Since my husband and I married she has changed her mind about ending alimony as she thinks her ex-husband in a better financial situation since our marriage. Somehow this doesn't seem fair as my assets shouldn't be a determinating factor.

What are the laws regarding an ex- spouse claiming alimony while cohabitating?

Originally Posted by Unregistered My husband is still paying alimony 9 years after his divorce due to the fact that his ex-wife has crones. His ex-wife has been living common law with her boyfriend for the past couple of years and has invested in her boyfriend's home from the division of assets from the family home. She has put a suite in her boyfriend's house which she claims to be living in, she is also using a separate address from her boyfriend's in order to continue alimony. My husband tried to discuss an end date to the alimony with her, but, she does not want to discuss the ending of alimony and therefore enrolled him with family maintenance to stop any further discussion. She had said at one time that alimony would stop once the last child completed high school, it has now been three years since the last child graduated. Since my husband and I married she has changed her mind about ending alimony as she thinks her ex-husband in a better financial situation since our marriage. Somehow this doesn't seem fair as my assets shouldn't be a determinating factor. What are the laws regarding an ex- spouse claiming alimony while cohabitating?

It's not so much about the laws, as it is about exactly what your husband's divirce decree/spousal support order states.

He needs to read the order to see if there is any provision regarding co-habitation, an end date to alimony, or if the order is modifiable.

[neescee]

Divorced in CA in 2000. At that time the spousal support law was 'support until the recipient remarries or otherwise, not the `half the duration of marraige. Though the judge did state that it could be readdressed at a different time. Ex has tried to end it once earlier but was unsuccessful.
I am quickly approaching the half way mark at the same time our youngest son turns 18. I am anticipating a trip back to court.
Ex is financially very well off and I have carved out a modest living. No complaints but the ending of spousal and child support could put me out of my home.
Where do I stand?

[tbyte]

A man would be embarrassed about living off the income of a woman, but some women seem to consider it their birthright to live off the income of men.
Aren't you old enough to take care of yourself yet?
Ridiculous.

[neescee]

Originally Posted by tbyte A man would be embarrassed about living off the income of a woman, but some women seem to consider it their birthright to live off the income of men. Aren't you old enough to take care of yourself yet? Ridiculous.

Curious you think you know my personal situation well enough to make a personal snide attack.
Having dedicated 16 years to being a homemaker and raising his sons rendered me unmarketable and making a mere $800 monthly to start. Does it matter that I supported him as he educated himself and raised within the ranks to make over 150K per year? As I mentioned I have carved out a decent life but not enough to keep a roof over my head in todays econony. Had I known what I know now I would have not made the sacrifice to raise my kids but continued to keep `an edge'. Respectfully I have done my part and work 10 hour days currently. As he approaches retirement I realize I this is something I won't have the opportunity to experience. Why should women such as myself pay the price for having been a homemaker? By-the-way - "Homemaker' <- His choice not mine. That's why we aren't together. Never my master plan to loose myself. But that's a whole 'nother story'
So TBYTE, think of me this September when I move in with my Mother!

[tbyte]

If he was making 150K per year with multiple dependents, you were getting plenty of child support, not to mention alimony. You have had 16 years to improve your situation, while having your expenses paid for you. If you have wasted this opportunity you have nobody to blame but yourself.
The fact that you let this opportunity pass by you simply bolsters my argument about women looking at alimony and child support as their entitlement by gender.
Don't expect any pity party from me about how you were too busy being a homemaker to work on your career. I raised four children while managing to further my career, and, as the father, I never received a penny in child support from their mother.

Originally Posted by neescee Divorced in CA in 2000. At that time the spousal support law was 'support until the recipient remarries or otherwise, not the `half the duration of marraige. Though the judge did state that it could be readdressed at a different time. Ex has tried to end it once earlier but was unsuccessful. I am quickly approaching the half way mark at the same time our youngest son turns 18. I am anticipating a trip back to court. Ex is financially very well off and I have carved out a modest living. No complaints but the ending of spousal and child support could put me out of my home. Where do I stand?

I never did get alimony, was threatened if I even thought about asking. I too was a home maker, ending up finally getting out of the marriage because of mental abuse from a control freak, ended up with depression and anxiety, nicely along with FM, I guess count yourself lucky for getting what you did.

Originally Posted by tbyte If he was making 150K per year with multiple dependents, you were getting plenty of child support, not to mention alimony. You have had 16 years to improve your situation, while having your expenses paid for you. If you have wasted this opportunity you have nobody to blame but yourself. The fact that you let this opportunity pass by you simply bolsters my argument about women looking at alimony and child support as their entitlement by gender. Don't expect any pity party from me about how you were too busy being a homemaker to work on your career. I raised four children while managing to further my career, and, as the father, I never received a penny in child support from their mother.

Although you do have some valid points, as a Mod I would think that you could, or at least should deliver your advice/opinion in a more dignified manner. People are coming here for advice and help, not for personal attacks and judgement calls on how they have lived their lives.

You were able to further your career while going through your divorce, well done. But partly I'm sure due to the fact that your a man, it is after all still a man's world. Men still get paid more for doing the same job as a woman. And many times they get hired instead of a woman, especially if that woman is single or divorced and with children. Also it is very apparent that you had more education and job skills from the beginning than the woman your passing judement on. Consider that possibly because you received no alimony from your wife, and maybe no other help from her either, you may be just a little bitter because of it?

Honestly your response to her post looked like something a Mod should have stepped in and diffused not composed.