What do I do if I were to leave our relationship?

[s3nsf4ct1on]

My wife and I have been married for almost 9 years. We had a good relationship at the beginning but then more often and more often she got sick. she had endometriosis, she was sick ALL the time, lacking in energy, 90% of the time she comes home from work and sits in bed reading or playing on the computer.
I get up in the morning, i make our breakfast and our son's i make his lunch, i make sure everyone has clothes and i make sure we get out of the house on time. I work all day and come home and have to cook, clean, do laundry all the housework and prep for the next day while she sits in bed cause she has no energy to do anything.
I met someone, we never did anything physically, but we talked, and it got somewhat emotional, my wife was almost gone, non existent. I needed a connection and felt i had to stay in my marriage cause i don't trust my wife to take care of my son alone.

Here is the complicated part. I work for her parents. So if i leave her, how can i work, it will be extremely difficult, her brother works here, her sister in law, her, her father & her mother. If i were to leave our relationship work would be almost virtually impossible. But what do i do, she is crazy, she has on numerous times freaked out completely, saying she is having suicidal thoughts but won't go see help, she expects that i should be able to help her work through this and move past her psychological problems. I am by no means a psychologist. She has on numerous times hit me, or punched me, or shoved me.

I am no angel, I talked to another woman which in her mind is cheating. And maybe it is. We have spent the last year trying to recover and today we are no further ahead then were were when she found out i had been talking to someone. She told my son i was looking for a new mother, she screams, like a devil when we're arguing and he can hear this.

I want to leave, but i don't know what to do , my life is so intertwined in my life i can't find a solution and am hoping someone maybe anyone can give some advice that just might point me in the right direction.

I am worried she will do everything to keep me from my son which is why im not sure what to do, she has told me she would beat her legs up and take pictures and tell people i did it, she has said in arguments to go ask our son if im yelling at her.

I use marijuana medicinally because I have bouts of vomitting and it helps with the nausea, it was HER suggestion, she once said to me in an argument that just to remember that if anything ever happened she would have this against me now, and then she told me to tell my son and just smoke in front of him.

Last night we had an argument and i apologized said everythign was my fault, she said she didn't believe me and wanted me to swear, i said im saying i apologize that should be good enough, she said it wasn't so i swore on our house and our relationship (her wishes) when i did this, she said it wasn't good enough, that she wanted me to swear on my son and our dog. Nothing is ever good enough, and she has said this, i do EVERYTHING in our home and she has told me that "it's not enough". She has alienated all our friends because she is so unhappy with herself that she judges everyone and expects they do the same. She won't have people over, we don't talk to anyone and i feel like we're just wasting away.

I love my son so much, i don't trust her alone with him but worry that she and her parents would lie to manipulate the system in order to keep me from him, when i know full well that i am the more capable parent, he is 5, in that time she has given him maybe 20 baths in his life, she rarely puts him to bed, she never takes him to the park.

She stayed home with him at the beginning while i went to work and she would do NOTHING all day, i would come home the house would be a disaster all food dishes on the counter, dishwasher not run and my son had been couped up in the house all day, i would have had to take him to the park around 6pm, come back around 645, clean up, cook dinner, give him a bath all the while her doing nothing.

What do i do, do i leave, do i take my son? We don't have any savings so it's not like i have a ton of cash to talk to a lawyer or go get an apartment.

[AFFA]

I wish to inform you that you can have child custody.In this regard you must first obtain evidence that your wife is unfit parent. In court you will be required to prove all the facts and therefore you must obtain evidence as a first step. after you have collected evidence that you may file in court for child custody along with divorce and can get separated. Other person may not manipulate things if you can show conclusive evidence of your facts.

AFF

[Friend In Court]

First, you need to preserve your income and develop some autonomy for you are under bondage to your wife and her family. As a first step I would recommend securing different employment. Then your income will be more secure and less likely to be impacted by any moves you make in your domestic situation.

Then filing for separation or divorce with custody of your son would seem in order. The actions you describe are that of a very sick woman, emotionally or mentally ill. In a contested custody matter psychological evaluations can be ordered especially if requested by one of the parties setting out facts that indicate it is warranted. Courts are to evaluate both parents as to fitness to parent the child(ren) and psychological evaluations are one of the factors they consider. Clinical psychologists are best suited for this type of evaluation for they are the only ones qualified to administer and interpret psychological tests.

A contested custody matter is by no means inexpensive, especially when expert witnesses like psychologists are involved. One can anticipate evaluations to run several thousand dollars, not counting attorneys billings and depositions, trial attendance of experts.

That is one reason I suggest you get yourself ensconsed in another job where your income is more secure and at least on the job you will have more peace of mind than being under the scrutiny and thumb of your wife and her relatives.