PFA question.

[joelynch6]

My wife filed a PFA against me with false allegations in PA. There is no criminal complaint against me or no arrest made. During a period of 1 year, 14 times my wife called cops at our home alleaging me as an abuser/harrasment etc. and evrytime cops left our place by giveing warnings. I never hit my wife or abused her.

My and her attorny made a deal.
Based on the deal on court date I didn't admitted to the allegations.
On final order the jury selected/checked the "By agreement without admission".

Does this above selected option will help me to prove that I am not an abuser in case any future things like Separation/Child custody/Divorce?

I am staying away from her for 18 months and have visitation rights to my 18 months kid.

14 times in 1 year is way too many. Stay away from her for more than 18 months. Stay away from her for good. It's obvious you have an extremely unhealthy relationship.

Yes, it can affect your visitation arrangement. Never simply agree to the opposing side's proposals. Why did you not have your own attorney?

This woman is trouble and you're better off with her out of your life. She'll continue to use the courts to keep you in line and that she's gotten away with it so many times is an indication of how she'll step up her efforts in the future.

Now it's time to focus on maintaining a relationship with your child and have as little to do with the mother as possible.

[joelynch6]

Thanks for quick response. Upon cops instructions I stayed separate in the same house inside basement for whole 1 year. I did this out of love for my son who was too young. I assumed the responsibilty of a provider to her and son. Since past 6 months she started objecting me to meet my kid. She deprived me. Still I didn't gave up. Even the Sherrif adviced me to leave that place but I thought she will change. Man eveyday after returing from work and weekends were like living hell for me. At least I feel peaceful because of this PFA.

I am building my strength now. Thinking of filing for separation/divorce.
Does the staying separate for PFA period(18 months) becomes ground for divorce?

The only grounds you need for divorce is irreconcilable differences. Considering how many times the police have been to your house that certainly qualifies.

The PFA is not normally considered grounds for divorce but a divorce is certainly in your best interest. Get as far away from this destructive woman as possible.

Most definitely file for divorce. Life with this unstable woman will only get worse. She's using the court system to beat you over the head and punish you for making her angry at you. Get out now while you still can. Good luck to you.

[joelynch6]

Thanks for your advice. I realized now how wasteful it is to hope for other person to change.
I am not a "Gandhi" (today is his birth day) but I wish to be like him.

Today I talked to my lawyer who represented me for PFA. I asked him to speak to her lawyer about mutual consent divorce, so he spoke. He told me that her lawyer told him that my wife is filing for a divorce.

I am not sure on what ground it will be from her side. shall I wait till she issue divorce proceedings or file a divorce from my side?

It will most likely be irreconcilable differences. Most courts don't bother with blame game types of grounds, so expect Irreconcilable Differences.

You don't need to petition yourself. Just wait until you are served, take the papers to your attorney and then answer the complaint. Whatever you do, don't contest the divorce. But don't allow your assets to be taken away from you either. Play fair, but know when you're being bamboozled and fight for what you believe is fair and right. She'll more than likely try to take you for everything, and try to keep the children from being able to spend time with you. These are the two areas you need to make your wants heard.

Thank your lucky stars you're finally getting rid of this disturbed woman. No, people don't usually change unless they recognize they have issues and want to change for themselves. Unfortunately, that rarely happens in real life.

I wish you good luck.

[joelynch6]

You said not to contest the divorce BUT how do I protect my asset as well has have right for joint custody?

Those issues will be brought up as the divorce progresses. Contesting a divorce means saying you are not in agreement with it and will fight the other party in obtaining one. Of course, no judge in the U.S. actually permits this, as one cannot be forced to remain married to another person if they don't want to.

You need to speak to an attorney. You are not going to get concrete answers here on the issues that are uniquely yours.