PLEASE READ HELP

I was hoping someone could help me. all my young adult life i had been working towards becoming a physician. My family was not finicially able to help me out so i took out medical school loans. at the end of my residency i had consolidated my loans because the interest rate was lower than my original loans. a year later i was diagnosed with cancer and never got a chance to work let alone practice medicine. I have been battling cancer now for approx 3 years and have recenctly found out that it has spread to bone which is incurable. I married and the person i married also has student loans which they are paying back now.(both of us took out our loans before we met. My consolidated loan is in forbearence and is reaching close to 200,000 dollars (was lower but the interest while in residency and forbearence has accrued). I am terrified. I am only in my 30's. My poor betterhalf has been emotionally by my side throughout this and financially as well struggling to pay their own debt - my medical bills etc.
Since my cancer spread to bone, im not giving up the fight but i don't see myself consistently working anytime soon and can't see my better half being able to carry even more of a financial burden. My forbearence will run out later next year and then i do not know what to do.
So i am deparately need advice
can they take money, assets or withhold money from my spouse (my loans were NOT consolidated with my spouses and like i said we took them out before we new each other....we live in new york state but i don't know if any of this info helps)
what about filing taxes Even though i don't work the past 2 years we have filed together should we still do that?
what happens if i pass away? i hope he doesn't have to pay for my loans what about medical bills in my name?
I have heard of loan discharge and have not considered it up until this point but now that the cancer is in my bone and not curable i know that i am not going to be able to work consistently at any job let alone make a professional salary.
I also heard that it is quite impossible to get loan discharge. what happens if they decline to release my loan. Will i be working for the rest of what ever life i have left( some say i can live up to 10 years) trying to pay 200,000 dollars worth of student loans thats suppose to be paid over a life time????

I am confused and scared and don't know how to protect us in the event that i have to pay these loans if any body can give us advise how i should proceed it would be like ten thousand weights off my shoulders.

I

There are extreme hardship exceptions and frankly they don't really have too many options to collect from you even if they do sue.

You may want to briefly consult a debtors rights lawyer to make a plan to proceed.