Show Cause

A little background:

I have been served with a show cause from my ex-husband. I was
supposed to have the house refinanced in my name within 3 months of our
divorce. It has been over 3 years and I haven't done it. We were both doing okay with the status quo and he knew I was having major issues with refinancing due to a bankruptcy on my part. I'm actually in the process of getting the house refinanced now since it has been 2+ years since I filed the bankruptcy and I've been on time with all payments. The last step is to get permission from the court(because of the bankruptcy) and then I can sign the papers to refinance. All the other stuff has been done. It will take about 1-2 weeks to get permission. He knows all this and has even called the loan company to confirm. This is happening in Virginia in case that makes a difference.

I would like to know if Estoppel by Laches would be an adequate defense for me? I'm not asking to not do my part, just to give me the time needed to wait on the refinancing. He has a lawyer and I don't. I am very nervous about going to court and I do not know how to present my defense, if I'm even given the opportunity. I'm also not sure what the court can make me do or if they can make me pay him damages. The only reason I can think of that he is doing this now is because I told him I was filing for a modification of child support. To me it is nothing more than a numbers game. His support went down when his income was less and I was making more and now it will go up again. He will have to pay about $400 more per month based on a significant raise in his income.

Again, I realize I should have done my part a long time ago and I'm not denying the truth of what the show cause is stating, but I was stupid to think I would be able to refinance the house in such a short time. I had been a stay at home mom with very little job experience or college. Now, I just want to be able to protect myself in court.

Thank you for any help.