Innocent By-Stander or Victim?

Can I sue my fiancee's ex-wife for mental anguish or other?
How can he afford an attorney when we can hardly afford food?
Can she sue for an increase based on the money that I have deposited into our joint checking account?

Here's the back story...

My fiancee's ex-wife has issued an order to increase his $400 a month child support payment for his 13yr old sons extra "social" activities (including band, camp, etc.). He makes between $1600 and $1800 a month, and his income is mostly tip based, so nothing is guaranteed. He and I live together and have a joint bank account, which has been active for over a year. All of my paychecks, stock sales, 401k payouts, and tax returns have gone into this account along with his bi-weekly paychecks. I am currently unemployed and the stock and 401k moneys in our accout came from my former employers settlement with me. We have been lead to believe that she has an "informant" within our bank that has notified her of this surplus of deposits. Currently she lives in a $300,000 home with her new husband and we live in a $570 a month apartment with a roommate, and are still up to our ears in debt. We can barely afford to pay our monthly bills while I am searching for a new job. We are living off ramen noodles for crying out loud and she's taking cruises to San Juan in the summers. We had intended to take a loan out against my fiancee's company 401k to pay for our wedding and honeymoon later this year, but now we're facing putting that $4k towards a lawyer to keep from losing what is left of our lively hood. I try to see the best in people, and I may be nieve, but she is a vindictive and manipulative woman that has said negative things in front of her son about my fiancee. She enrolls him in summer programs that we never know about until its time to pay the fees. She has violated the orignal divorce decree by not allowing my fiancee to see his son on pre-designated dates throughout the year. I could keep going....


I seriously don't know what to do, and now he has two weeks to find a lawyer, find the money to pay for the lawyer, and somehow find a way to survive financially through this. What do we do? What can we do?

[Xena]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Can I sue my fiancee's ex-wife for mental anguish or other?
How can he afford an attorney when we can hardly afford food?
Can she sue for an increase based on the money that I have deposited into our joint checking account?

Here's the back story...

My fiancee's ex-wife has issued an order to increase his $400 a month child support payment for his 13yr old sons extra "social" activities (including band, camp, etc.). He makes between $1600 and $1800 a month, and his income is mostly tip based, so nothing is guaranteed. He and I live together and have a joint bank account, which has been active for over a year. All of my paychecks, stock sales, 401k payouts, and tax returns have gone into this account along with his bi-weekly paychecks. I am currently unemployed and the stock and 401k moneys in our accout came from my former employers settlement with me. We have been lead to believe that she has an "informant" within our bank that has notified her of this surplus of deposits. Currently she lives in a $300,000 home with her new husband and we live in a $570 a month apartment with a roommate, and are still up to our ears in debt. We can barely afford to pay our monthly bills while I am searching for a new job. We are living off ramen noodles for crying out loud and she's taking cruises to San Juan in the summers. We had intended to take a loan out against my fiancee's company 401k to pay for our wedding and honeymoon later this year, but now we're facing putting that $4k towards a lawyer to keep from losing what is left of our lively hood. I try to see the best in people, and I may be nieve, but she is a vindictive and manipulative woman that has said negative things in front of her son about my fiancee. She enrolls him in summer programs that we never know about until its time to pay the fees. She has violated the orignal divorce decree by not allowing my fiancee to see his son on pre-designated dates throughout the year. I could keep going....


I seriously don't know what to do, and now he has two weeks to find a lawyer, find the money to pay for the lawyer, and somehow find a way to survive financially through this. What do we do? What can we do?

First and foremost :

Take ALL of YOUR money out of the joint account and open an account in your name only with it. DO NOT DELAY in doing this, and remove ONLY what is YOUR money out of the account.

The modification will be based soley on what your fiance's income is and that is easier to prove when you do not co-mingle your monies. Sometimes a court will order that a NCP assist in paying for extras, but usually only when the NCP has a high income.

If the mother is denying visits, she is in contempt of the court visitation order, your fiance can file to have the visitation order enforced.