I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

This is a discussion on I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece? within the Child Custody & Support forum, part of the FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY category; After 16 years of never meeting my brothers daughter, I come to find out that neither parents ever terminated their ...

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Old Jan 23rd, 2013, 08:01 PM   #1
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Angry I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

After 16 years of never meeting my brothers daughter, I come to find out that neither parents ever terminated their rights!!! I was angry.. Can I get their permission and try to go forward with trying to see my niece and if yes what would be the cheapest and best way to do this? Just some info, the mothers parents have the child and she has some sort of disability, plus she is being home schooled.. so they keep a close eye on her.. the only reason we don't have any contact is because they want to erase all of us from her life..please help me!!
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Old Jan 23rd, 2013, 08:16 PM   #2
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Default re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

It may not be in her medical best interest for other family to be involved.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2013, 08:28 PM   #3
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Default re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

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After 16 years of never meeting my brothers daughter, I come to find out that neither parents ever terminated their rights!!! I was angry.. Can I get their permission and try to go forward with trying to see my niece and if yes what would be the cheapest and best way to do this? Just some info, the mothers parents have the child and she has some sort of disability, plus she is being home schooled.. so they keep a close eye on her.. the only reason we don't have any contact is because they want to erase all of us from her life..please help me!!
If you haven't been involved in the child's life up until now, then it's entirely possible they chose for you NOT to be.

It really doesn't matter if you want to have contact with this child. The parents, or in this case, the mother's parents (who have guardianship over the child) are the ones to decide who does and does not get to have a relationship with the child.

The courts are unlikely to grant you any kind of visitation rights, so your best bet is to ask the grandparents to allow it. If they won't, then you're out of luck until the child turns 18 and is able to make the decision to see you on her own. If that's the case, it's already been 16 years - another two isn't going to make a huge difference in the matter.
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 12:57 PM   #4
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Default Re: I am an aunt how can I get full custody for my niece

I am an aunt of a 4 year old Niece. First thing first, while my sister was cultural married to my BIL (brother in law). They had 2 kids a boy n a girl. So, they decided to have another child. My sister not knowing that he is cheating on her left her pregnant at 4 months n left to go be with his new girlfriend. My sister stressed and depressed. After her pregnancy she had my beautiful niece. My sister will leave her kids to my other sister to watch. She would lie that she's going to work n make a better for herself n her kids. But, nope she'll use her time to go out with friends and party. Getting drunk every now n there. My niece was only a infant at the time still drinking formula. N I was still in High school my junior year. I as my family label me as the babysitter and child lover. Every time I'm on breaks or winter break I'll be over to babysit my niece. My boyfriend at the time we would babysit weeks or days. My sister works 24/7. So call.

It was to the point where my other sisters are fed up with our older sister working 24/7 of the week, days, n years. After, I was done with high school. I got engage and move out to live with my fiancé. We took in my niece. She always sees us as her mom n dad. She started calling us mommy n daddy. At this point we all were attached to each other. My sister came to visit her at my fiancé place one time. My fiancé supported my niece with milk, food, clothes, you name it. She was basically our baby. It was to the point when every time I see my sister. I would ask her to sign my niece over to me. She never answer me up front. Kept ignoring me. She'll always said to me why can't I just watch and take care of my niece for her cus, when I was a baby she babysat me. It's totally different. I'm not babysitting my niece I'll raising her and supporting her. The father of my niece came this one time n got her from me. It's a long story. I have my niece living with me for 2 years now. I love her darly n I'm trying to get full custody of her. My sister is now remarried live in another state. She'll call my niece n tells her how much she loves her. i hated that she does that. my niece is very confused that she has two mommies. Everytime, my sister n i talk ots just like cat n dog. i just stay away from talking to her. my sister always threaten me that I can't turn to child custody to get my niece because if my niece's birth father knows he'll fight back n win automatically. She doesn't want to charge child support on him or do all those legal stuff. Her work is just messy! She doesn't want to take my niece with her to her new marriage because the man she married doesn't like her kids. I started to believe her that I would never win. Why? Because I thought she's my sister then she''s with me. I don't think so, she only in it for herself because she kept leaving her kids around that now people get attached and she thinks its just a free support day care. She's only covering for herself him her ex husband. So, i thought to myself. theres some aunts that have there niece full custody n granparent why can't i? i'm not a bad person. don't do drugs, dont smoke. I really need help. Just waiting to get an attorney's phone call. It's been years n I'm so stressed over this. So many sleepless nights. Wouldn't want my fiancé and I to loose our baby girl.

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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 02:48 PM   #5
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Default Re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

It is not your girl. You have no solid basis to claim she is. You should never have represented yourselves as her parents.
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 02:59 PM   #6
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Default Re: I am an aunt how can I get full custody for my niece

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Originally Posted by Nicole1991 View Post
I am an aunt of a 4 year old Niece. First thing first, while my sister was cultural married to my BIL (brother in law). They had 2 kids a boy n a girl. So, they decided to have another child. My sister not knowing that he is cheating on her left her pregnant at 4 months n left to go be with his new girlfriend. My sister stressed and depressed. After her pregnancy she had my beautiful niece. My sister will leave her kids to my other sister to watch. She would lie that she's going to work n make a better for herself n her kids. But, nope she'll use her time to go out with friends and party. Getting drunk every now n there. My niece was only a infant at the time still drinking formula. N I was still in High school my junior year. I as my family label me as the babysitter and child lover. Every time I'm on breaks or winter break I'll be over to babysit my niece. My boyfriend at the time we would babysit weeks or days. My sister works 24/7. So call.

It was to the point where my other sisters are fed up with our older sister working 24/7 of the week, days, n years. After, I was done with high school. I got engage and move out to live with my fiancé. We took in my niece. She always sees us as her mom n dad. She started calling us mommy n daddy. At this point we all were attached to each other. My sister came to visit her at my fiancé place one time. My fiancé supported my niece with milk, food, clothes, you name it. She was basically our baby. It was to the point when every time I see my sister. I would ask her to sign my niece over to me. She never answer me up front. Kept ignoring me. She'll always said to me why can't I just watch and take care of my niece for her cus, when I was a baby she babysat me. It's totally different. I'm not babysitting my niece I'll raising her and supporting her. The father of my niece came this one time n got her from me. It's a long story. I have my niece living with me for 2 years now. I love her darly n I'm trying to get full custody of her. My sister is now remarried live in another state. She'll call my niece n tells her how much she loves her. i hated that she does that. my niece is very confused that she has two mommies. Everytime, my sister n i talk ots just like cat n dog. i just stay away from talking to her. my sister always threaten me that I can't turn to child custody to get my niece because if my niece's birth father knows he'll fight back n win automatically. She doesn't want to charge child support on him or do all those legal stuff. Her work is just messy! She doesn't want to take my niece with her to her new marriage because the man she married doesn't like her kids. I started to believe her that I would never win. Why? Because I thought she's my sister then she''s with me. I don't think so, she only in it for herself because she kept leaving her kids around that now people get attached and she thinks its just a free support day care. She's only covering for herself him her ex husband. So, i thought to myself. theres some aunts that have there niece full custody n granparent why can't i? i'm not a bad person. don't do drugs, dont smoke. I really need help. Just waiting to get an attorney's phone call. It's been years n I'm so stressed over this. So many sleepless nights. Wouldn't want my fiancé and I to loose our baby girl.
No doubt you must be very attached to her. But she is NOT "your baby girl." She has a mother and father and regardless of how negligent you believe the mother has been, she not only has dibs when it comes to custody but the father has given notice he will apply for custody of his child.
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 03:53 PM   #7
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Default Re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

I don't feel like anyone answered my question// neither parents have seen or heard from my niece since she was a baby.. the only people who have "legal" right is my brother and his ex. I guess what im wondering since they arent trying should i get a lawyer for them, pay for the services and try to help them win custody.. since they seem to not put any effort into it.. if they give me permission to do so?
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 04:09 PM   #8
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Default Re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

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I don't feel like anyone answered my question// neither parents have seen or heard from my niece since she was a baby.. the only people who have "legal" right is my brother and his ex. I guess what im wondering since they arent trying should i get a lawyer for them, pay for the services and try to help them win custody.. since they seem to not put any effort into it.. if they give me permission to do so?
So for your own selfish desires, you are going to spend thousands in an attempt to get a disabled child placed with parents that could care less she exists!!! Give you a clue, at this stage, the court will likely deem it in the childs best interest to stay where she is at.
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 07:21 PM   #9
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Default Re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

First of all we dont know the condition of this child.. 2nd the parents didnt like my brother and their daughter was way to young at the time so they didnt want anyone to have anything to do with this child. none of her other grandparents or cousins aunts or uncles ever met her either.. they wanted to raise this child as their own because their daughter was more unruly.. so whatever attitude you have about my situation.. you dont know the situation.. and i feel that no one should punish other people that had nothing to do with young peoples mistakes... so all i wanted to get was some advice on the best cause not some negative stuff from you!! if its a bad idea and i should wait until 18 i will.. but my brother who is not educated didnt think he could do it and no money and the mother she just doesnt care so thats not right to take her away from other people.. and anyway the parents still have their rights so if they so choose and i get better advice from someone who has more productive time on their hands, then someone who mocks people then i will know ... thank you and please stop typing so i can get some actual educated advice or opinions
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Old Jan 24th, 2013, 07:25 PM   #10
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Default Re: I am an aunt... Can I get their permission to see my niece?

oh and one more thing, if i so choose to spend an alloted amount of money then so be it.... people spend top dollars on tobacco and junk food, and i dont so thats really my own selfish wishes...
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