WORLD Law Direct Forums
Home > WORLD Law Direct Forums > FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY > Child Custody & Support > Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

This is a discussion on Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time? within the Child Custody & Support forum, part of the FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY category; Currently, their father has supervised visits by me, for no less than two hours a week. Every other week is ...

Consult Your Own Personal Lawyer Now!
Reply  POST NEW QUESTION

 

Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread Display Modes
Old Apr 30th, 2012, 07:22 AM   #1
Junior Member
Country:  
motherof224's Flag is: United States
 

motherof224's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 1

Default Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

Currently, their father has supervised visits by me, for no less than two hours a week. Every other week is to take place in his town, then a half way point between us both. The distance between us currently is 3 hours total.
I was granted this custody arrangement in an expedited motion for temporary relief, and it was then continued at the next hearing. We were to have our final hearing but it has now been rescheduled due to the judge being ill. We still have no date. Currently the order has been effect since July 2011.
Our court order states that “the parties are to arrange and coordinate visitation weekly”. It states no set times, dates, or deadlines. Their father has been abusing this arrangement by never agreeing to a specific time, date, or place, waiting until the last day of the week around 5 pm, and then stating “you are refusing me access to the children” or “I guess you don’t want me to even see my children”.
My counsel was to very informally try to just agree and arrange any time, however met with this type of behavior back. The responses I receive when asking about setting a time, date, or place, are met with hostility, complete off topic points, or just stating I don’t let him visit the kids; hence, never about an actual time to see them. At which point, I just set a time and date, at the advice of my counsel.
He has completed 5 visits of the limited time he does have. All the others he has either showed up late, didn’t stay the entire two hours and left early, did not show, or forfeited in advance. He does not call, write, or email asking about them. Instead, when I email asking about when he wants to set the time, he sends me “refusing to tell me anything about the children again. Sad. Pathetic.” Or “neglecting the court order once again I see not letting me talk to my kids.”
Currently the advice of my counsel is I ask him to choose the visitation time, if he doesn’t by a certain deadline, then I choose the visitation time, and either way the other party has to confirm or it’s considered forfeit. He says this is in direct violation of the court order and my lawyer cannot hold him to any sort of deadlines, or times, etc. And at this point, he is refusing to respond to any of my emails regarding setting up a time. Nor does he send any email on his behalf to ask me.
The court order states that he has the right to contact them to keep up the bond between parent and child. It does not state that I have to contact him, which is important if you are wondering why I don’t just call him. At one point, I was calling or texting once a day, every day and telling him about the children, which was met with nothing but hostility towards me, my friends, family, lifestyle, etc. Calling me every derogatory word you could think of, or suggesting off color things about me, or even so far and I quote I should kill myself and do those kids a favor. I would call/text once per day, he would respond with usually at least over five throughout the day or all at once.
My original question on here was about restricted phone calls, which is now a non issue. He was calling from his phone, now he has stopped calling altogether now that his number is known by my lawyer, and he continues to send derogatory, slightly off color comments to my phone via text. The only texts you can say that are related to the kids are ones where he will send late at night, after the day has elapsed and state, “so I guess you are refusing to tell me about my children again”. I don’t know what to do at this point, except accept his behavior because unfortunately I had children with him.
If he will not even complete two hour, supervised visits, how will the court ever give him more time? Should he even have more time? What are my rights at this point?
motherof224 is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Our lawyers can help you avoid foreclosure to salvage your home, buy time to pay mortgage debts, and resolve your financial troubles. Consult Your Own Personal Lawyer Now!
Old Apr 30th, 2012, 08:29 AM   #2
Top Level Member
Country:  
sunlover's Flag is: United States
 

sunlover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,108

Default re: Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

You cannot force him to use his visitation time. Your lawyer is your source of legal answers not us. However his idea is best set the time with instructions that if he does not reply then there will be no visit. Save all emails, test etc to show Judge
sunlover is offline   Reply With Quote

Did you find this post helpful? Yes | No
Old Apr 30th, 2012, 11:40 AM   #3
Top Level Member
Country:  
Friend In Court's Flag is: United States
 
Friend In Court's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 11,750

Default Re: Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

What you will need to do with this guy is document thoroughly every contact with him. The dates set, the last minute changes or attempts to arrange, missed meetings, leaving early, etc. This log can be introduced as evidence at the hearing and should show just how diligent he has been and how he has abused the visitation order.

Save the abusive texts, too, for they are also hard evidence of his attitude and threats.

You may wish to discuss supervised visits at a county/state facility which takes you out of the picture. He will have to pay for those times, too. His arrival and departure plus interaction with the child(ren) will be logged and noted. If they are abusive enough, you may consider discussing a restraining order with your lawyer or an order that fines him for each and every inappropriate text or email he sends you.

It sounds as if he has some psychological issues. It is not uncommon for evaluations to be done in child custody cases, usually of both parents, before making a final custody decree. WIth the actions he is taking, it just may be that some pathology will be discovered that the court needs to know before it makes its final order.
Friend In Court is online now   Reply With Quote

Did you find this post helpful? Yes | No
Old May 7th, 2012, 12:53 PM   #4
Veteran Member
Country:  
mystical45's Flag is: United States
 
mystical45's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 143

Default Re: Not exercising visitation... how will the court ever give him more time?

Curious that the supervised visits would be by the custodial parent when there seems to be such animosity there. Seems that a neutral third party would be better served here, poster did not say why visits need to supervised, assume this is court ordered? Suggestion, pick a neutral third party to supervise the visits, remove yourself from the situation.
__________________
Mystic
mystical45 is offline   Reply With Quote

Did you find this post helpful? Yes | No
Reply

Bookmark & Share

This thread has 3 replies and has been viewed 874 times

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Format Your Messages
Add Forum to Google Toolbar
Forum Jump

Similar Threads

Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
The affidavit of service does not give a time frame Isitthateasy Child Custody & Support 2 Sep 20th, 2013 01:18 PM
Parent Left State And Has Grandmother Exercising Visitation Suddenlysingle Child Custody & Support 7 Dec 12th, 2011 05:23 PM
Child visitation: Should I bring our visitation agreement to court? Unregistered Child Custody & Support 2 Feb 16th, 2011 02:54 PM
grandparents rights to visitation: can we request visitation at the court? smith Child Custody & Support 2 Mar 3rd, 2010 11:51 AM
no visitation penalty (parenting time, visitation violations) gsn Child Custody & Support 2 Sep 2nd, 2009 08:53 PM


Our lawyers can help you avoid foreclosure to salvage your home, buy time to pay mortgage debts, and resolve your financial troubles. Consult Your Own Personal Lawyer Now!


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:47 AM.