I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me

This is a discussion on I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me within the Child Custody & Support forum, part of the FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY category; Hi im Avril and i am 13. my parents divorced when i was 3 and have been apart for 10 ...

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Old Sep 15th, 2011, 08:58 AM   #1
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Unhappy I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me

Hi im Avril and i am 13. my parents divorced when i was 3 and have been apart for 10 years my dad went to court for custody because my mom and stepdad are violent people and they lie all the time and play games. And that was two years after they divorced i want to live with my dad permantly, but my mom won't let me. And i now my mom plays games but and lies but i cant change her and i know that i need help i want my dad to have custody and i will do everything to get that cause i am treated better i am happier and i love my dad and my stepmom more then anything i need help i dont want to see my mom every again cause of what she has gone to me. i want to get out please respond if you have an answer to my problem or a idea of how i can get out of this life long mess.
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Old Sep 15th, 2011, 09:56 AM   #2
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Default Re: I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me

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Originally Posted by avrilgriffon View Post
Hi im Avril and i am 13. my parents divorced when i was 3 and have been apart for 10 years my dad went to court for custody because my mom and stepdad are violent people and they lie all the time and play games. And that was two years after they divorced i want to live with my dad permantly, but my mom won't let me. And i now my mom plays games but and lies but i cant change her and i know that i need help i want my dad to have custody and i will do everything to get that cause i am treated better i am happier and i love my dad and my stepmom more then anything i need help i dont want to see my mom every again cause of what she has gone to me. i want to get out please respond if you have an answer to my problem or a idea of how i can get out of this life long mess.
You can make your home situation known to other adults like your school counselor, and if there is violence, especially. Children's Protective Services is another agency that can help as well. Many states have social workers through Children's Protective Services that will aid resolving problems in the family as an alternative to placing in a foster home. That last option is not necessary since you have a father who is willing to have you live with him.

Custody actions are usually "he said, she said" affairs and with a previous custody battle already settled with custody with your mother, courts are reluctant to reverse unless there is a real reason -- a change of circumstances. And the party seeking to modify, change, the order has to have evidence to justify doing do. That is where third parties come in like school counselors, social workers, therapists, neighbors, etc.

Also, at 13 you are at the age where the courts may factor your wishes into the decision. Your reasons alone usually are not adequate, but are considered along with the other evidence. If your father supports the change of residence, perhaps he can arrange for you to see a therapist who works with teens and families -- and would be willing to issue a report on his or her findings so it might bolster the desired change of custody.

Nothing ever remains the same. Things are always are changing. Keep your chin up and things may work out well, after all.
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Old Sep 15th, 2011, 02:43 PM   #3
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Unhappy Re: I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me

but i am already seeing a counselor and i already have tried to tell the school and the talked to my mum and step dad and they lied to them saying i lied and my dad lies and child services have come over about 3 times and have been sited 2 times in my state and 1 time in new jersey all the sitings were on my step dad except the one in new jersey was called cause he abused his own children. My step dad (bill) is abusive in words and physically he is out of control and i have been seeing a counselor for 8 yrs. and my mom put bill, my step dad, in counseling this year for hitting her in may and she puts everyone else in counseling but herself cause she thinks she isn't the problem, but she is the whole reason why i hate her and bill but bill put my hate on himself to let you know for 10 years i have dealt with them i think i know there lies, there games, there minds, and there ability.
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Old Apr 26th, 2012, 05:00 PM   #4
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Default Re: I want to live with my dad and stepmom but my mom won't let me

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Originally Posted by avrilgriffon View Post
Hi im Avril and i am 13. my parents divorced when i was 3 and have been apart for 10 years my dad went to court for custody because my mom and stepdad are violent people and they lie all the time and play games. And that was two years after they divorced i want to live with my dad permantly, but my mom won't let me. And i now my mom plays games but and lies but i cant change her and i know that i need help i want my dad to have custody and i will do everything to get that cause i am treated better i am happier and i love my dad and my stepmom more then anything i need help i dont want to see my mom every again cause of what she has gone to me. i want to get out please respond if you have an answer to my problem or a idea of how i can get out of this life long mess.
your dad can try to file for custody and the judge will hear your wishes but ultimitley the judge makes the decision
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