Custody dealing with order of protection and vacations out of state

[GoodMomNeedHelp]

I am from New York and I have questions regarding custody of my child. I have not yet consulted with an attorney and my understanding of the custody of my 21 month old child are unclear.
I currently have an order of protection against the biological father, and my son lives with me, so I guess that is considered physical custody. His father is practically homeless, has a terrible temper and has physically harmed me but he adamantly wants to see his son. He does not provide financially at all. He has bought a few items here and there. I am the more suitable parent and take great care of my child. I tried giving him a chance, by watching my son while I work, but he has caused me to lose 2 jobs from continually not showing up. He still tries to control my life by threatening me (about child support, relocating out of state, dating etc.) although we have not been together in over 2 years, he left me for someone else when I was pregnant. He is constantly calling me degrading names and is verbally abusive.
I would like to go on vacation to my uncles house out of state with my son. Do I need his approval to even go on vacation with my son? Does the order of protection grant me sole custody? And are these affects permanent or should I go to court? Also, he is currently trying to make me allow him in my home to see his son, which I am against. Would I be at fault for letting him come around to see my son? Is not letting him come here considered witholding my son from him and against the law? Thank you so much for reading. Any advice is greatly appreciated.

[Friend In Court]

Without a custody decree, there is nothing prohibiting you from vacationing out of state with your son. The order of protection is just that and if you allow him into your home you will be violating the order of protection yourself.

You need to get the issue of custody settled with you and any visitation most likely supervised. No, in the meantime with the order of protection you absolutely should not have any one on one dealings with him. Period. Go by the letter of the order, see a lawyer about bringing a custody/support/visitation motion and go off on vacation and enjoy yourself in the meantime.

[GoodMomNeedHelp]

Thank you so much for your time and input. I will be sure to contact a lawyer for further consultation regarding custody and other family law issues, but it's peace of mind knowing a website like this exists. I will take your advice and enjoy the time with my family.