Can I lose custody of my minor children because of my adult children?

[Kellymillican]

The guardian ad litem in my custody case with my ex-husband has demanded that my adult children (18 and 19 years old) that do NOT reside in my home, take mandatory hair follicle drug tests. If they refuse, then she will deny me summer visitation with my minor children. Can she do this?? (I was required to take a hair follicle test in April and passed, so did my husband).

[AFFA]

I wish to inform you that court considers best interest of child as main consideration. In this regard as your adult children are not living with you therefore hair follicle test of your adult children should not affect your child custody rights. As your adult children are at present neither under your supervision nor living with you so you may argue that this matter does not affect the well being of minor. Other parent must be asked to show how this test will affect well being of child.

AFF

[Lexus]

If the adult children are not residing with you then she cannot deny you summer visitation with minor children. You may submit to the court hat both your adult children are not living with you and they are not under your control for the time being. Court will consider the best interest of the child in custody matters. So if you could convince the court that you are doing all this in the best interest of the children, then the court will pass appropriate orders.

[Kellymillican]

THANK YOU!! My attorney told me that he can't get me summer visitation until my adult children take the drug tests. I have always had custody of my minor children until Apr 22 of this year. The GAL removed them and put them with their father because of two of my step children (who have since moved to their mother's home), and rumors and hearsay from my current husbands ex wife. She called the GAL and accused me of being a child abuser and a drug addict. The GAL made me take a drug test, which I did and passed. I have never been arrested nor has DHR EVER filed anything against me. My children are straight A students and I am a stay at home mom. Since she took my children away, she has given my ex husband everything he wants from no more meeting (now I have to do ALL the driving), he has changed the pick up/drop off times, he limits my conversations with the children to only between the hrs of 3:30-5:30 pm. What can I do to get the GAL investigated or taken off the case for being biased?

[Friend In Court]

Originally Posted by Kellymillican THANK YOU!! My attorney told me that he can't get me summer visitation until my adult children take the drug tests. I have always had custody of my minor children until Apr 22 of this year. The GAL removed them and put them with their father because of two of my step children (who have since moved to their mother's home), and rumors and hearsay from my current husbands ex wife. She called the GAL and accused me of being a child abuser and a drug addict. The GAL made me take a drug test, which I did and passed. I have never been arrested nor has DHR EVER filed anything against me. My children are straight A students and I am a stay at home mom. Since she took my children away, she has given my ex husband everything he wants from no more meeting (now I have to do ALL the driving), he has changed the pick up/drop off times, he limits my conversations with the children to only between the hrs of 3:30-5:30 pm. What can I do to get the GAL investigated or taken off the case for being biased?

Where your attorney has told you to comply with the request, I would recommend you follow his advice. And discuss with your lawyer having the court remove the GAL. The sum total of the restrictions on your access to the children appears to be unreasonable.

Originally Posted by Kellymillican The guardian ad litem in my custody case with my ex-husband has demanded that my adult children (18 and 19 years old) that do NOT reside in my home, take mandatory hair follicle drug tests. If they refuse, then she will deny me summer visitation with my minor children. Can she do this?? (I was required to take a hair follicle test in April and passed, so did my husband).

Yes, she can. It's perfectly legal.

You can file a complaint if you believe she's being biased, but GAL's are the children's attorney, and do not work for either parent. So it's unclear why you believe she's biased.

[Kellymillican]

She's biased because she has changed our previous order that was done in a separate county to benefit my ex husband (who is paying her fees). We (me, my ex, my attorney and his attorney had a mediation where we agreed on times, weekends and the place to meet to drop off and pick up the children. The GAL has told my ex that he can demand I do ALL the driving if I want to see the children. When I had custody I did 5 hours of the drive and he did 1 1/2. Now, he doesn't even leave his house. How does THIS have ANY effect on the children? When I had custody, I had NO restrictions on when the kids spoke to their dad, but the GAL told my ex that he should give me specific dates and a two hour window when I can speak to my children. My husbands ex wife found out that MY ex husband was trying to take my children away from me and because he HATES me sooooo much, she called my ex and his current wife and told them that I was a drug addict and a child abuser. The GAL TOOK MY CHILDREN because of hear say. I took a drug test and passed it.... I gave her DHR's telephone # so she could call and find out if I had ANY issues with child services, I DO NOT. My step children got into trouble with drugs and I made them go live with their mother, BUT BECAUSE of them, the GAL said I had an un safe environment for my minor children and now she's making two adults who do NOT reside with me take drug tests... Maybe BIASED is not the word.... Unprofessional and unethical is what I SHOULD have said. The very first time I MET the woman she told me she was prepared to take my kids. All because of rumors and hear say from someone whom she's never even met. Even the temporary order that gives the children to my ex husband "temporarily" says NOTHING about ME... It talks about my step children and my ADULT children who don't even LIVE with me. She didn't even investigate the case. She didn't call my children's school, their doctors, my references... NOTHING. Just because my ex solely pays her, then she does what benefits HIM. That cannot be denied.

I'm sorry for your situation but just because your ex is paying for the GAL's services does not in any way mean she's working for him.

If you feel that she's crossed the line ethically as an attorney, you must file a complaint against her with the Bar Association.

You must present proof that she's committed wrongdoing.

Are you sure you're providing the entire story? Normally, it takes nothing short of murder for children to be physically removed from their mother's custody.

You really need to fire your current attorney and hire one who will work for you. You're paying. They're supposed to give you good service for your money. You'd have better luck going it alone.

File a complaint against the GAL. She's clearly crossed the line. Perhaps you could hire an private investigator. Perhaps she's bedded your husband or wants to and that's her motivation. Something is very wrong with her behavior and conduct regarding your case.

Ask your new attorney to have the GAL fired from your children's case. They're your children too and you do have some say in who they're represented by.

It almost sounds like one of your adult step children is under suspicion for physically abusing your minor children in some way.

[Kellymillican]

Yes I know it sounds completely ridiculous but as God as my witness, that's the WHOLE entire story. THAT is why I think she's biased. She has YET to have a valid reason for removing my children from me. I filed a complaint with the Bar Association and it will take 60 - 90 days for anything to be investigated. By THAT time HOPEFULLY we'll have gone to court for the FINAL hearing and The Dear Lord willing, the judge will see what a HORRIBLE job the GAL has done and will give me back my children. I have told my attorney on SEVERAL occasions that I want an emergency hearing. I have also told him on SEVERAL occasions that the judge needs to know what she's done and doing and she needs to be fired, or removed, whatever it takes. All he says is "Attacking the Guardian is probably not your nest course of action" and "the judge is the one who chose this GAL, we don't want to piss him off". I'm SERIOUS. That's all I've gotten out of him. NOTHING!!!! And since she took my kids, I've majorly injured my back in an accident and my doctor has stopped me from being in a car for more than 6 hours a day. Well it takes 6 1/2 to get to my ex's home to pick up my children so if I drove to his house to pick them up, I would have to spend the night in that town before I could come back home. Then I would have to turn around the very next day (Sunday) and drive them BACK, spend the night again and not get home until Monday... But the GAL has REFUSED to tell my ex to meet me 1/2 way with my children, so it's been a month since I've even SEEN THEM!!! NO HELP FROM ANYONE!!!!! I wish I could afford another attorney, but I've sunk 10 grand into this jerk already, I don't have another $3000 to retain a new one...I don't understand what our legal system has become.It's like being involved with the MOB!

[Kellymillican]

AND TODAY WAS A GREAT DAY because I have PROOF that my ex husbands wife has been PAYING my husbsands ex wife to give her information, TRUE or NOT. Come to find out my husbands cousin lives next door to my husbands ex wife. They had a plan at one time to Get my husband fired from his job (as a teacher). When they realized they couldn't accomplish that, my step daughter told them, if you want to destroy dad, you have to go after (ME). So, they contacted the GAL on my case as well as my ex husband and his wife and made up VICIOUS LIES about me. That was ALL it took. A bunch of hearsay and lifes from the ex wife of my husband and the current wife of MY ex husband and the GAL yanked my kids. NO PROOF, NO RESEARCH, NO NOTHING!!! And the GREAT news is that one of the co conspirators, had a change of heart, and called me and told me EVERYTHING. She's going to one of our attorney's tomorrow, writing a statement about EVERYTHING that was said and everything that happened and HOPEFULLY I will get my babies back. Everyone PLEASE PRAY for me that God will see all the wicked, evil doings in the case and send me back my babies.......