Injustice and wrong: I witnessed a child support case in Tennessee

I recently witnessed a child support case in roane county where the parents of 2 children were divorced and had joint custody. The children lived with the father during the school year and with the mother during the summer, The mother has visitation every other weekend and open to any time the children were available and wished to visit. The father is remarried and lives on a very large 3 story house inside a golfing community . quoted from one of the children " we have 9 big screen TV's. The father makes $14 an hour and the step mother makes $ 28. They arent hurting for anything. The mother is single, lives in a 2 bedroom mobile home with wood heat to help keep the electric bill down. struggles to make ends meet ,and tries her best to give the children what they ask for whenever possible. The judge stated that child support is determined by the number of days of care provided by each parent. He allowed an automatic 52 days a year for the weekends and said that the summer days allowed a grand total of 70 days that the children were with the mother. You do the math. Summer is at least 70 days in itself . Therefore the mother has been ordered to pay the father over 600 a month in child support. This means she will run the risk of loosing her vehicle, her phone , her auto insurance and much more because after paying that amount she will have 400 a month to live on. Wheres the justice. What can be done to right this ?

Originally Posted by Unregistered I recently witnessed a child support case in roane county where the parents of 2 children were divorced and had joint custody. The children lived with the father during the school year and with the mother during the summer, The mother has visitation every other weekend and open to any time the children were available and wished to visit. The father is remarried and lives on a very large 3 story house inside a golfing community . quoted from one of the children " we have 9 big screen TV's. The father makes $14 an hour and the step mother makes $ 28. They arent hurting for anything. The mother is single, lives in a 2 bedroom mobile home with wood heat to help keep the electric bill down. struggles to make ends meet ,and tries her best to give the children what they ask for whenever possible. The judge stated that child support is determined by the number of days of care provided by each parent. He allowed an automatic 52 days a year for the weekends and said that the summer days allowed a grand total of 70 days that the children were with the mother. You do the math. Summer is at least 70 days in itself . Therefore the mother has been ordered to pay the father over 600 a month in child support. This means she will run the risk of loosing her vehicle, her phone , her auto insurance and much more because after paying that amount she will have 400 a month to live on. Wheres the justice. What can be done to right this ?

Aww, poor mommy...they FINALLY got one case right.
And it doesn't matter if the step mother is making $500 an hour, none of HER money is calculated into the child support equation. If the mother is so bad off, why don't she do like yall tell the men to do, get two or three jobs to support her children. If she doesn't have them full time then there is NOTHING stopping her from working two or three jobs.

I don't think you're going to find any sympathy here.

Fathers who have custody of their children 50% (and more) of the time are frequently ALSO ordered to pay the mother child support, but,,, the mother isn't ordered to pay child support to the father as well. Do the math equation and tell me if that is "fair" or even makes sense.

All I see from your post is that there is finally some justice for the father in that particular custody battle.

Who is the judge? I need him for my case. My ex can't hold a job, so she feels that I should subsidize her by paying even more child support. In the mean time, all she does is surf the internet and post blogs calling our government a socialist state, blah, blah, blah.... Freaking hypocrite. I guess its ok to milk an ex, but not your government, huh...

Yea I'd like to get him here in our state too! Does he have any siblings that do the same thing?

Originally Posted by Unregistered Aww, poor mommy...they FINALLY got one case right. And it doesn't matter if the step mother is making $500 an hour, none of HER money is calculated into the child support equation. If the mother is so bad off, why don't she do like yall tell the men to do, get two or three jobs to support her children. If she doesn't have them full time then there is NOTHING stopping her from working two or three jobs.

It's not about men against women in cases like this like everyone says. It's about the kids and what is best. People that don't see that are the ones that shouldn't have their kids. Now if the judge deemed it's best the father has the kid(s) then he based that off of facts he saw or found and I agree. I do not think one side gets "hosed" more than the other. Each case is different. Parents need to get their crap together and stop complaining men get it all or women get off easy. Judges make the decisions either way so instead of blaming someone instead of yourself, think about why the judge did that! If the mom in this case is that bad off I do happen to agree she should go out and get another job or something. I agree with the judge here because it's right, not because finally a woman should "get it", and I myself am a woman!

Yea i think the most judges need to have something shoved up their ass because in my case i have three lovely kids whom ive been there for all their lives and supported... i get them every other weekend and holidays and every weekend during the summer, which i fought for every weekend all the time but that didnt work.... i have to pay her 2200 a month which leaves me with 1400 a month whats fair now pluse she just got a job now add in about another 1000 to that 2200... u cant tell me it takes 2200 to raise those 3 kids on her time..... with my 1400 i have to pay all my other bills plus feed them and cloth them when they r at my house.....hmmm fair or not fair??????

[Injustice72]

At times the system fails. I feel terrible for this woman. I am going through something in my divorce and custody that is injustice at its best. My heart goes out to this mother.

[messyjessi]

Originally Posted by Unregistered I recently witnessed a child support case in roane county where the parents of 2 children were divorced and had joint custody. The children lived with the father during the school year and with the mother during the summer, The mother has visitation every other weekend and open to any time the children were available and wished to visit. The father is remarried and lives on a very large 3 story house inside a golfing community . quoted from one of the children " we have 9 big screen TV's. The father makes $14 an hour and the step mother makes $ 28. They arent hurting for anything. The mother is single, lives in a 2 bedroom mobile home with wood heat to help keep the electric bill down. struggles to make ends meet ,and tries her best to give the children what they ask for whenever possible. The judge stated that child support is determined by the number of days of care provided by each parent. He allowed an automatic 52 days a year for the weekends and said that the summer days allowed a grand total of 70 days that the children were with the mother. You do the math. Summer is at least 70 days in itself . Therefore the mother has been ordered to pay the father over 600 a month in child support. This means she will run the risk of loosing her vehicle, her phone , her auto insurance and much more because after paying that amount she will have 400 a month to live on. Wheres the justice. What can be done to right this ?

what you should do is butt out. this is between the parents and legally none of your business

[foxmom]

That is terrible for everyone involved. I had a child at 16, and the father did not even see him until he was 3-4 years old since he lived with his new girlfriend and denied my son was even his child. For 1 year from 4-5 years of age he saw him off and on and missed several daddytime visits and I was left explaining to my son, his father was busy,e tc, making up excuses for him even though the real answer was that he decided to go party and play with the girlfriend for the week. When my son was 6 years old he settled down and was to get married. The time from 3 years old to 6 years old I was in college, taking out loans and recieving between 0-$100 month in child support. When I got to my last year of nursing school, my son needed extra attention for school work and I was not there since I was finishing clinical 12 hour days then working nights at the hospital on the weekends. He went to live with his father, since he was not in school and had settled down. He was offereing to help since I had him by myself for 6 years. I let my son live with him as that was the best thing for him and I knew I would never be able to provide for my children (I had another child at 19) and would only be able to work at a fast food place for the rest of my life. I knew I had to graduate. So I did, even thought the father refused to allow me to send money (what little I had from school loans and my little night job) I did provide clothing, school supplies, fees, etc. I graduate then go into the army and this is where the trouble started. The papers I had to sign to be able to go into the army for family emergency plan required I give custody to the father. The original atty drew up the papers incorrectly and did not state I will get him when I get out of the Army. When I got out I got married and went to get my son back, as now the father is working off shore two weeks at a time and my son is telling me about getting slapped in the face, hit with a bungee cord, etc. They file first for child support through the state even though I have my atty paid and on hold because I did not want to cause a stink over the holidays. The abuse continues, the state does nothing, court battle rocks on for 6 years, child psychologist says he should be in my home, they back date child support 3 years and don't even spend the money on my child. I am now married and have a 3 year old daughter. I was laid off from my job and unable to get another home health position in my small town, therefore missing a few child support payments. Even though the child was with me for the summer the step mom sends messages stating they "have not been paid" in a while and she needs to fix her lexus and pay the house note. My son goes without nice clothing or a decent phone and she spends the money to keep herself out of jail since she stole $40,000 from the bank. So the judge gives custody to a theiving step mom since the father is working off shore for 2 weeks at a time, and she tells my son over and over again I don't love him and I never went into the army. He is now 14 and does not know what to believe. He even told me a couple months ago "My dad still slaps me in the face, but I deserve it" For anyone to think they deserve to get slapped in the face, they have been abused for a long time. The 4 cases sent to child protection from the doctors, police, and school involved resulted in nothing, since he would not come out and tel them what had happened to him even though he had the obvious burns, bruises, slash down his back, etc.....but since the CHILD would not admit to them what happened, keep in mind he has now had time to go back to his father and have "the real" story told to him so he would know what to say, nothing was ever done. So now I missed a few child support payments even though he is with me for the summer and now I get a contempt charge a suspended 90 day jail sentence, 24 months probation, and have to come up with $1900 by October. They abuse physicaly and mentally my son, make all kinds of promises to him about fancyvacations, moving here, etc----has not happened yet, and tell him he can move here when he goes to college. They allow him to stay out until 2 am at 14 years old, keep him around the family that steals, drug arrests, DUI's, fraud, etc......but that is where the judge ordered him to be. I had a seat belt ticket and my dad had a seat belt ticket. yes we are criminals. So you tell me where the justice in the justice system is? Crack head mothers have more rights. Had those original papers been drawn up correctly we wouldn't be here fighting this battle. What do you do. I have been through 4 atty and 2 told me there is something going on under the table. 2 state senators have told me something is not right here. I was warned prior to starting this battle the step mom had a lot of connections in the courthouse. How do you fight a battle that was already decided with something goin gon under the table? Child suport was even miscalculated and they refuse to change it, making my arrears more than they should be. Both the father and me have different jobs making less money but they refuse to change it. So what do you do when you work to pay someone else's household bills while they have 2 more children, drive lexus and nice big 4 door truck, with nice brick home, bells and whistles. Where is the jsutice, why should one family suffer while the other lives high on the hog. Should one really have to pay for the money to get spent on other things than the child and they abuse him too? Should one family live below poverty level and pay for insurance etc while the other family draws state insurance...oh yea they lied about the income there too. How do you help your child, because in this case child support is welfare and is not tracked and abuse is evident.