New 14 year old child support worries

[mr worry]

14 years ago in college a lady friend said she was pregnant. She took me to child support in Louisville KY. I asked for a DNA/blood test she refused. I begged her to take the test for years and she refused. 14 years later married with 2 children she pops up out of the blue, Stating your child wants to see you. I asked for a dna test and it came back positive, I was the father. Now they are trying to make me run back and forth to Mississippi (the state they live in) to go to court about child support. I don't have the money to keep driving back and forth. Do I have to go even when I know they arent going to except the 14% of my pay? What happens if only my lawyer shows? Will I have to pay her lawyer fees. PS.. the case was closed in Louisville KY in 2002 because she refused to take the DNA test?

[sunlover]

Talk to your Lawyer he should be able to appear on your behalf. Be ready to pay back support for those 14 years and current support

[mr worry]

Since I followed the courts direction in 14 years ago and took the test even know she refused my lawyer and others said I wouldn't have to pay for the 14 years. My question is, do I have to pay her current legal fees? Please tell me there's justice for a law abiding citizen trapped in the games of college hood rats (lying, sneaky women)

[sunlover]

Since you have a Lawyer your questions should be directed there

[mr worry]

I'm sorry I didn't explain in detail. I don't have a lawyer yet because I have to acquire one in Mississippi. The first time I went by myself. I just call different lawyers and ask prices and what I should do?

[sunlover]

Your facing legal issue so you require informed legal help. This means talking to an Attorney. Keep in mind she can request her legal fees be paid but she will need to show cause for that as well

When she refused, that would have been the time to seek court assistance in obtaining the DNA test. You allowed her to simply refuse without pushing the issue. But that's a moot point, since recent DNA testing has proven you to be the child's father.

Unfortunately, family court and welfare works in such a way that allows these types of situations to favor mothers for their atrocious acts. You will likely have to pay child support for this child.

You do not have to attend child support hearings if you don't want to, and it's unclear why there are so many court dates regarding it. You will be ordered to pay something and they do not have to accept a percentage you come up with that you feel is reasonable.

As for your comments about law abiding citizens trapped by "hood rats", you must realize that you share the personal accountability in this situation. You had unprotected sex with a woman outside of marriage which resulted in a pregnancy. You then did not push hard enough for the paternity test (which would have only led to you paying child support that much sooner). Don't blame all of this on the woman you had unprotected sex with. You have some accountability here as well. "Begging" a woman in that kind of position is fruitless. You get tough and take her to court and fight for your rights. She did not hoodwink you. You allowed her to call the shots.

Originally Posted by Unregistered Unfortunately, family court and welfare works in such a way that allows these types of situations to favor mothers for their atrocious acts. You will likely have to pay child support for this child. You do not have to attend child support hearings if you don't want to, and it's unclear why there are so many court dates regarding it. You will be ordered to pay something and they do not have to accept a percentage you come up with that you feel is reasonable. .

And once child support is established, you need to then fight her for visitation. Once this is established, it will more than likely be supervised at first.

If she refuses visits after it is ordered by the court, take her to court for contempt. Beleive me, she will find every excuse in the book to take you to court if you owe her money. And courts favor the women in this situation totally. It's the golden va jay jay rule.

Please stop with the "golden va jay jay". What are you, 12? Family court has made it possible for women to be favored more often, and when something is easily available, it's human nature to take advantage of that.

Fathers lose because they sit back and complain but rarely take any aggressive legal action. This is a typical case in point: the father begged her for a paternity test but she refused. Upon her refusal, he simply dropped it. He could have petitioned the court for a paternity test back when he first discovered the child could be his. He didn't. He let her control the situation.

The father in this case can petition for visitation of the child and since he has a family (kids) of his own, it's unlikely his visitation will require supervision. He does have the right to get to know this child, so visitation is something he really should petition the court for.

What the woman doesn't realize is that opening up this can of worms regarding child support also opens up his rights to actually petition for custody of the child.

He will not have to pay her attorney fees, since she's the one petitioning for the child support after refusing all these years to unite father with his child.