jurisdiction as well as compliance

There has been an ongoing court case in effect in Dutchess County where we live. The last time that we were in court (feb) it was stated that my fiance would have his son most of the time since he had a job that ended before the hours of 5pm on a regular basis. It was also stipulated that if there was a total of 3 times that either himself of the mother did not show up to pick up there son at the designated times stated (given a15 min leeway) action would be taken. This has happened 3 times (within the first month) by the mother and NOTHING has been done. Was that just something said to appease my fiance? What can be done to act on this?
Also this court case was adjourned until august and has been in dutchess county since the child was born....he even has a law guardian appointed through this county. However, recently the mother who know lives in another county decided to try to take him back to court for more money---however she has begun another case in her county. Is this right? Basically I feel as though she is going behind the current judges back to try to get more money when it was looked upon in court that she was just out for the money and had no other reason to want to keep the parental rights of their son otherwise. Also she receives services such as food stamps as well as possibly section 8 to get help with her rent. The problem is that the child support payments have never gone through the system and he just pays her by check bi monthly. He tried to go to court to have that rendered and have it taken directly out of his check...where they told him he would need to file a petition to do that and bring her back to court AGAIN. Can she do this? Take money from the state as well as child support AND THEN also go through a different court system even though we already have an open case elsewhere? I am losing my mind. It seems that everything is in favor of the mother in NY and no matter how much she may mess up she is just lightly tapped on the hand whereas if he had faltered in the same way holy hell would break lose!! Please help!