Oregon unwed mother, Sole custody, no contact with ncp 6+ years

I was never Married to Bio Father, bio father moved out of state.

Bio-Father had a weekend visit in 2004 and my child came home covered in bruises from being spanked at least 18 times with a leather belt (my son was 6 years old). CPS was contacted came to investigate, they interview Terrance, Took photos and told me that if I ever sent him back with bio dad I would be charged with Child endangerment. CPS however never gave me a paper stating so.

Bio dad attempted to get joint custody in 2004, however neglected to pay his attorney so attorney never filed paperwork witht he court and an actual final court date was never set.

I have remained within the 60 mile requirement, and maintained public records, and since 2004, have not been contacted by bio-father.

Bio-father was ordered to pay child support in 2001, and his name is on the Birth Certificate.

Bio-Father only pays child support when the State "catches up" with him and will quit shortly after.

He is in arrears over $12,000.00

I am happliy married have 3 wonderful boys and a husband who has been raising oldest for 5 years.

I want to file for sole custody, however I have attempted to locate a current location for bio-dad, even called child support office, who told me that it was confidential and to public search.

I have done so, but truthfully I am scared to death of this man... he HATES me for fighting back.

My son is 12 remembers the abuse and DOESN'T want anything to do with bio-dad.

I have attempted to get a copy of the abuse report from CPS, but again... its confidential...

Does anyone have any ideas aside from posting in the paper (which I have done twice) getting no response, and having a judge say... well there are three current (within the last year) child support payments, so I would have to say that shows some intent for care, petition denied, come back when you have tried harder to locate him...

I am at my wits end. My son was awarded a writing award that gives him a scolarship to go to Italy for 3 weeks in August and much to my suprise, I need absent bio dads signature to get his passport. My child is devistated, and so am I... he worked so hard for this... can I claim "abandonment" based on his deliberate lack of contact even if the occasional 75.00 child support comes in?

I'm sorry, I am so frustrated, I have not been this upset in a long time... I can't figure out how he can have rights to a child that he refused to have contact with, then the one contact he did have, he spanked him repeatadly leaving deep bruises. What about MY rights, and the rights of my 12year old who is ten times as responsible as bio dad and is having his dreams CRUSHED to protect bio-dads rights.

How very odd a judge would say that. Child support and custody are two entirely separate matters, and, in fact, most judges don't hear both cases at once.

It's also highly irregular that CPS will not provide you with copies, since it was your case. Confidentiality does not apply since it is your own case and there would be no conflict.

You would have been better off subpoenaing the testimony of whoever told you that if you ever sent the child back you'd be charged with child endangerment. That would have gone a long way in solving this.

The sad fact is; children don't have rights. Adults do. That's the strange way society is set up.

I strongly urge you to consult with an attorney over this. You should be able to petition the court to terminate his rights based on all of the information you give here. I'd fight to either have a more competent judge hear the case, or have that judge recused. He's obviously an idiot.

What is very odd, too, reading your post again, is, if you were never married to this man, and his parental rights were never legally established in a court of law, why it is a judge would even say he has any say in anything you do. As an unwed mother, you automatically have sole legal custody once your child is born.

Signing a birth certificate is not enough for a man to establish legal rights as far as any sort of custody goes. He must visit court and have his parental rights established.

Where you made your mistake was going after him for child support. You opened up the door to his establishing parental rights. That's the double edged sword women don't think of when they hit men in the wallet for child support.

Unless he has established rights, you have sole custody of the child and do not need his permission for anything. Again, the judge who resides in your case is a total and complete idiot.

Originally Posted by Unregistered I was never Married to Bio Father, bio father moved out of state. Bio-Father had a weekend visit in 2004 and my child came home covered in bruises from being spanked at least 18 times with a leather belt (my son was 6 years old). CPS was contacted came to investigate, they interview Terrance, Took photos and told me that if I ever sent him back with bio dad I would be charged with Child endangerment. CPS however never gave me a paper stating so. Bio dad attempted to get joint custody in 2004, however neglected to pay his attorney so attorney never filed paperwork witht he court and an actual final court date was never set. I have remained within the 60 mile requirement, and maintained public records, and since 2004, have not been contacted by bio-father. Bio-father was ordered to pay child support in 2001, and his name is on the Birth Certificate. Bio-Father only pays child support when the State "catches up" with him and will quit shortly after. He is in arrears over $12,000.00 I am happliy married have 3 wonderful boys and a husband who has been raising oldest for 5 years. I want to file for sole custody, however I have attempted to locate a current location for bio-dad, even called child support office, who told me that it was confidential and to public search. I have done so, but truthfully I am scared to death of this man... he HATES me for fighting back. My son is 12 remembers the abuse and DOESN'T want anything to do with bio-dad. I have attempted to get a copy of the abuse report from CPS, but again... its confidential... Does anyone have any ideas aside from posting in the paper (which I have done twice) getting no response, and having a judge say... well there are three current (within the last year) child support payments, so I would have to say that shows some intent for care, petition denied, come back when you have tried harder to locate him... I am at my wits end. My son was awarded a writing award that gives him a scolarship to go to Italy for 3 weeks in August and much to my suprise, I need absent bio dads signature to get his passport. My child is devistated, and so am I... he worked so hard for this... can I claim "abandonment" based on his deliberate lack of contact even if the occasional 75.00 child support comes in? I'm sorry, I am so frustrated, I have not been this upset in a long time... I can't figure out how he can have rights to a child that he refused to have contact with, then the one contact he did have, he spanked him repeatadly leaving deep bruises. What about MY rights, and the rights of my 12year old who is ten times as responsible as bio dad and is having his dreams CRUSHED to protect bio-dads rights.

he is not bio dad real father, natural father or a sperm donor-he is jsut plain dad. the only dad this child has.

[QUOTE=Unregistered;187520]he is not bio dad real father, natural father or a sperm donor-he is jsut plain dad. the only dad this child has.[/QUON


No -he is the biological father. A dad is someone who loves you and wants to be a part of your life.