visitation

Dear Readers,

Does anyone have any advice on ending a visitation schedule to where the non-custodial parent does not keep up their end of the bargain?
We have an agreement in writing that we have kept out of the courts. However the non-custodial parent is not showing up on their specified time. Also for you who will make the seriously negative comments. I do proof that this person abuses alcohol and drugs. I have tried to work with this person and I have tried to keep it out of court for both of us. Now I am to the point where the lies and the alcohol have gotten in the way. Can I terminate our agreement and tell them to take me to court? I am not sure what to do anymore?

[MenRparents2]

If you can prove that he is using illegal drugs in the presence of your child, then he is endagering your child. I would suggest protecting your child by all means in this situation. Have you talked about this with him? Were you very blunt with him? I would not suggest just keeping the child away b/c it could affect you if it goes to court.I know it is logical but he as a father also has rights, even if he is a drugged up drunk. I would however make sure that if I were transferring the child, he was sober and if not, do not turn the child over.

Thanks for the advice!

Since you do not have a court ordered child visitation order, you can do what you want right now. I would keep any child away from a drug addict/alcoholic parent.

He will unlikely take you to court to rectify. The children will be better off not being subjected to him right now.

Keep the courts out of it if you are worried about your children's welfare.

Anyone have any thoughts on what to do when there is no court order and the other parent doesnt show at the agreed time and place. Do we just keep showing up incase they decide too? It has been the past two weeks of no shows and they missed their childs birthday...no call, no gift....nothing?

Anyone have any thoughts on what to do when there is no court order and the other parent doesnt show at the agreed time and place. Do we just keep showing up incase they decide too? It has been the past two weeks of no shows and they missed their childs birthday...no call, no gift....nothing? Also he could not tell you whre the child goes to school, who their doctor is, what their favorite color is. He doesnt know a thing about the child and the visitation schedule has been inforce for 4 almost 5 months. Basically since child support kicked in. Already there have been 3 instances of where they could not make it or just didnt show.

You cannot force anyone to be a child's parent. That requires some modicum of responsibility and unfortunately, there are too many out there who have none.

If he's paying his child support, that is his legal financial obligation. His actually being a parent to the child is more of a moral obligation.

You cannot take him to court and force him to spend time with his child. It just doesn't work that way.

How has the visitation schedule been "in force" for 5 months if you have no court order for visitation?

It was just an agreement that I put together. The other parent has not showed up for the past three weeks?? I think I am done with all the BS and there will need to be a court order if they want to see their child.

Exactly. He is free to go to court and established court ordered visitation at this point.

Don't expect him to do so, however.