Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust in the U.S.?

This is a discussion on Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust in the U.S.? within the Child Custody & Support forum, part of the FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY category; I don't know where to begin, except why is the court system so unjust? My husband has been dealing with ...

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Old Aug 27th, 2009, 11:03 PM   #1
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Angry Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust in the U.S.?

I don't know where to begin, except why is the court system so unjust? My husband has been dealing with an angry mother of his oldest daughter for some time. She has with held his visitation too many times to count. She has a drug record that consists of cocaine, majauana, meth and been in jail 18 times in the past year and a half. She was smacked on the wrist and put on house arrest, with in the first 2 weeks she had 2 warrants for disregarding the house arrest and is awaiting a court date in Sept for that. She has lived with her parents for the past 3 years and has no vehicle of her own to even transport her kids expect her parents. She finally got a job and has been working for the last 2 months, however didn't work a day for the year before or more. She just lost custody to her middle child as that Judge gave her a drug test in that custody case which she failed. She lost custody. My husband and has been fighting a custody case with her for a year due to continuances and finally getting the case moved out of the original county. He had the arresting officer, 2 different city probation officers, and the person that administered the drug test appear in court for him, along with the father of the middle daughter who testified that she has not seen her middle daughter only 5 times in 8 months and has not paid a dime for child support. Her mother supports my husbands child for all school, food, clothing, etc. She tells us this when she visits. The mother was caught in lies about her drug history, her living arrangements (daughter(14) and brother (8)) sleep in the same room, same bed because there is not enough rooms. Why I now ask after enough money spent in fighting for her to have a better life and pay for half of her college, does my husband get notified that he did not only gain custody, but he has to PAY for her lawyer? There is no regard for a BAD Mother. I have seen it over and over again. The father is just there for the $$$. I am a woman and I will tell you that women that use their children as pawns and play the system deserve some true punishment. Everyone wants to talk about dead beat dads, what about fathers that step up to the plate to just keep getting knocked down again and handing over money hoping they can still afford to feed their kids when they are allowed to have them. Something has got to change!! Thank you for listening but I know nothing will ever make a difference! If you ask me the court system is warped and just another way to make money, mean while there are children not seeing a dime of it or there fathers! I don't expect any feed back or answers cause there is NO Lawyer that can change it. We have went through 3 already and believe me they to gladly took our money! A very angry step-mom!
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Old Aug 27th, 2009, 11:46 PM   #2
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

I agree with you.

Because Family Court laws are archaic and do not adhere to the standard under which Child Custody, Welfare, and Child Support were created, until enough men who realize how badly their civil rights have been violated and band together to have some of these laws repealed, things will not change.

It's surprising a good attorney hasn't taken on a case such as yours and won and succeeded in getting some of these archaic and unbalanced "laws" changed or repealed.

I do agree that our Family Court system needs a very serious change. It's outdated and obviously does not work. It only succeeds in breaking families apart and encouraging an abuse of Welfare and Child Support issues.
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 06:45 AM   #3
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

Wow. So sorry for your situation.

Not all moms are as you describe - and what you describe is in fact rare. You denfinately seem to have a hatred for moms...it's OK to hate that one mom and you're one situation but judging all by your prediciment is unfair and wrong. The problem with the family court system is there is no oversight. The judges only have to use laws as a guide, they don't have to follow it. Some judges look after the childs best interest (as in the case of her step-sister), some don't want to disrupt the "status-quo" (as it appears in your case) and some treat them like property splitting them down the middle in contentious situations much to the childs detriment.

I can't believe you lost with all that. How old is this child? Is she 14? Did she speak to the courts? What are the childs wants?
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 06:46 AM   #4
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

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archaic and unbalanced "laws" changed or repealed.
Not the laws that are archaic - it's the judges.
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 10:19 AM   #5
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

I beg to differ but it is the laws. Judges cannot simply override the laws and rule however they wish outside of the parameters. Whether they make a ruling that is fair to everyone, they still have to rule within the confines of the laws that are, indeed, archaic.
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 12:35 PM   #6
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

No, in custody proceedings judges are given wide discretion to make any ruling they see fit. The laws for custody are there for guidance only.

I too once thought the laws were important and to be followed in custody procedures. It was a mis-understanding on my part.
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 02:00 PM   #7
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

If you don't mind me asking, what did the judge in your case rule on that was illegal?
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 03:01 PM   #8
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

Na...don't want to go into it.
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Old Aug 28th, 2009, 03:50 PM   #9
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

If the judged ruled illegally, you can report him, as he/she cannot rule outside the guidelines of the law.

Of course, judges are different and one judge will make a ruling that another judge will rule differently on the same type of case, but they are always in the parameters of what the laws dictate they can rule on.

Judges have to follow the laws as well as anyone else and if a judge breaks those laws, he should be reported.

It's too bad you don't want to name a ruling that was illegal because it may help someone else on here who is going through the same type of situation. But of course, that is entirely up to you.
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Old Aug 29th, 2009, 08:54 AM   #10
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Default re: Tired & Angry Step-Mom: Why is the court system so unjust?

Every attorney I've spoken to said the custody laws are guildlines only and judges are given wide discretion. I've done a lot of case research with the Ohio supreme court docs...and they appear to be right.

My case was SERIOUSLY and OBVIOUSLY screwed up by the magistrate and did NOT follow the Ohio Revised Code. The judge that ruled on the appeal even said she didn't have to...I can't afford the next step in the appeal process. I'm already about to lose my home.

My daughter is paying the price... I'm still trying to get help for her, we've taken a big step towards it last week. Sorry...can't go into details...
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