California, ex wants to move with my kids, how do I stop this?

[jm202610]

Ex and I have been divorced for a year now, when we separated 3 years ago, we lived in Southern Cal. I did not prevent her from leaving our home in SoCal with our kids (then ages 3 and 4) to go 6 hours away to Northern Cal to go live with her parents. I had just been laid off and was looking for work and I felt I could not take care of the kids by myself. To this day, they still live with her parents. She WILL NOT get a job to support herself and to help support our children. The court gave her an imputed income of $1200 dollars a month. I have had a great job for the last 2 1/2 years, engaged and own a home, very stable now.

After a long battle, I have 20% custody and see my kids every month. This was the best we could do, since the kids are in school and live so far away. I make the 6 hr drive and bear all the costs: gas, hotel, etc. I do this because she claims she is sick and cannot drive (she was never able to prove this after countless doctor visits). Truth is, she just wants to free load, and her parents enable her. Regardless, the court is not making her help with transport for visitation.

Our CS and visitation agreements were just finalized in June, she waived alimony, and I agreed to pay an above guideline amount for child support. We both signed and filed, and all was well....well, so I thought....

At the end of July, she tells me that her father is retiring and moving to Alabama and she wants to move to Alabama with her parents and and take the kids. Also, she met a guy online 6 months ago, and says she will be marrying him in Sept. He is from Georgia, and in the military. He is going to Iraq right after they get married. She is gonna live with her parents until he gets home and then move to Georgia. She told me, "you can have all of summer, and I'll pay for half of transport"....oh, gee, thanks!

Even if I get all of summer, it will not be 20% because I will lose my one weekend a month visits. My custody share will decrease. And half of travel?? From Cali to Alabama it is about $500-800 for a roundtrip ticket depending on season, plus the kids are now 6 and 7 and will need to fly "unacompanied minor". Im worried about my young children flying alone basically. I know they will have an airline escort, but it still worries me. If I get all summer, spring and holiday vacations visitation will stay at 20%, but the travel costs are extraordinary.

Will she be able to take the kids? The current order says she cannot leave state without my approval, but she plans to petition this. Im afraid the court will let her take them 1000's of miles away, because she already lives 6 hours away by car. Do I stand a chance? After she gets married, it seems to me she will be supported by her new military hubby, rather than her parents, and because he will be away in Iraq, she will get a housing allowance and can move anywhere in the country. So how could a judge see her move as a necessity? I love my kids and would love to have the bigger share of custody. My future wife and I have the means to take care of them with stability. What to do? Help!

If you have a court order that states she cannot leave the state without your consent, make her stick to that. If she plans to petition it, mention to the judge how many men solicit women on the internet who are predators who may be unsuitable to be around your children. (MSNBC's To Catch a Predator comes to mind) Meeting men off the internet is one of the most dangerous ways to meet men.

Tell the judge you are concerned about who your wife allows around your children and demand they remain with you. Moving from CA to AL is quite a long way for two small children.

Fight her petition tooth and nail and force her to stay in the state or petition for a change in custody. It's really the only way you will stand a chance to keep your children close to you.

Man someone watches a little too much tv.. How about most of what he said is probably bs. I am in a situation married to the military and he isnt a pedafile! its not my fault men who are in new relationships think the ex wife is always a ***** and a bad mom.. but she wasnt when she was living closer! grow up!

You're married to the whole military but "he" isn't a "pedafile"? What's that? something you do your nails with? Your post is incoherent and has absolutely no point whatsoever.

Internet dating IS very dangerous. Not only for adults, but for children who live with irresponsible adults who move complete strangers into their homes within a few short weeks or months when small children are living in the home. Perhaps you SHOULD watch a bit more T.V. Start with the news.

Check out Katie Piper's story, a woman who met a deranged moron on Facebook, and the tragic results that followed.