Please give me advice.... child visitations

Myself and my boyfriend have an issue... he has three children, when we moved out of our small rural town (timmins) down to central Ontario in July/06 to provide a better life, and get better jobs the mother of his three boys has since cut all ties due to her anger over the issue. We spent 10 weeks trying to call her to see the kids before we left, (including calling her relatives, who were helpful before but have since stopped) we had regular biweekly visits with them until she heard we caught her in a lie.. she moved, did not give us her address, refused to answer any phone calls, her last communications in august (via msn mssenger) were that we would be receiving court papers and she abruptly signed off. She does not know our address, we are unable to contact her, and do not know where she lives except a street name. For over two months we have tried emailing her, to let her know we have her child support, and want to see the kids, to no avail. When we did have a phone number for her she changed it to stop us from contacting the kids...There are no court papers deciding custody and we do not know where to turn for help. Please send me in the right direction... all of the children are under the age of 6 and their father is a good father.. not a deadbeat, or a drunk or a druggie.. and this is killing us. We do not know our rights, nor do we know how to find a good attorney in our area. We also dont know the cost of getting court papers asking for visitation...please. any help is useful...

If she cannot be reached or located and dealt with normally, you may have to file in court and get an actual custody order that will establish a schedule and visitation obligations that are enforceable by the court. In some cases parents file by themselves but having counsel is usually a better idea. You may want to have family and friends search for her now--or if you have to, have a private detective or search firm locate her.

[worriedmom]

Here in Alberta we have family coucellors at the courthouse,free of charge who can get you a custody order but I don't know how that would help find her,or if she needs to be found for it to go through,but you should look at your court to see if theres someone like that that will help you,and if you can't find her and theres no custody order it means they have shared custody and wouldn't that be kidnapping? Ask someone at the court or even the police.If he has every right to see his children,then someone should be able to find her.

[pooh_200619]

Okay you stated that there was no order but you have her child support for her.. I'm not sure that I will hit the answer that you are looking for but I hope I do.. First if there is no order for custody or support on his behalf of the children in another county then you can file for custody in the county and state you reside in.. Make sure when you file for this you send a certified letter to the last known address that she was residing at..Explain to the judge there is no order for custody or support in any other county and you would like custody of his children the judge will ask if you sent a certified letter and make sure you keep the receipt from the letter being sent and most likely he will grant him visitation.. Then all you have to do is call the local police department in the county that she resides in and they will try to contact her and you will have your children soon enough once found.. Make sure you place a ad in the paper in county you think she's in and try to contact her thru family also and send them a copy of the order as well so if they do talk to her then they can inform her of the order if she refuses to comply then she will be in jail..Now if there is a order for support on the father then most likely there is a order in that county where the support goes you will need to file in that county for custody and make sure you file the paperwork and send a certified letter to the last known address again and ad in the paper also so she is aware that you have filed for custody.. If she refuses to show for court the judge will grant you custody and if you have at least a known road name then you can start from there knocking on door to door to search for them as well.. I hope I helped you the best that I can..Good Luck.. Custody papers are like 150.00 to file for custody or change of parenting time or change of domicile or anything in that matter..

Ihave a sittuation,Ihave a daughter who first met her father at the age of 4and a half. She has had visits with him for almost 6 years,she goes every other weekend. She would cry every time she had to go,I thought that would end soon but 6 years later she still cries,pretends to be sixk,she has even went as far to hide from them in closets and under beds when they would come to pick her up.she makes herself sick if she knows she has to go!! I still send her,even though it breaks my heart,i asked her why she doesn't want to go and she says she just doesn't like it there. no other answer!!I would really like to know what to do. She doesn'twant to go,but i am afraid if i don't send her i will get in trouble.But i hate seeing her upset!! Someone please help !!

unhappu childs mother

[quote=Unregistered;5260]Ihave a sittuation,Ihave a daughter who first met her father at the age of 4and a half. She has had visits with him for almost 6 years,she goes every other weekend. She would cry every time she had to go,I thought that would end soon but 6 years later she still cries,pretends to be sick,she has even went as far to hide from them in closets and under beds when they would come to pick her up.she makes herself sick if she knows she has to go!! I still send her,even though it breaks my heart,i asked her why she doesn't want to go and she says she just doesn't like it there. no other answer!!I would really like to know what to do. She doesn'twant to go,but i am afraid if i don't send her i will get in trouble.But i hate seeing her upset!! Someone please help !!how old does a child have to be to say she doesn't want to go anymore??

unhappy childs mother

You could have counselors meet with her to see what is the issue; if they think it is best to limit or change visits in some way they could testify as such in court and have the order adjusted, if an order exists.

[missingmyhubby]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Myself and my boyfriend have an issue... he has three children, when we moved out of our small rural town (timmins) down to central Ontario in July/06 to provide a better life, and get better jobs the mother of his three boys has since cut all ties due to her anger over the issue. We spent 10 weeks trying to call her to see the kids before we left, (including calling her relatives, who were helpful before but have since stopped) we had regular biweekly visits with them until she heard we caught her in a lie.. she moved, did not give us her address, refused to answer any phone calls, her last communications in august (via msn mssenger) were that we would be receiving court papers and she abruptly signed off. She does not know our address, we are unable to contact her, and do not know where she lives except a street name. For over two months we have tried emailing her, to let her know we have her child support, and want to see the kids, to no avail. When we did have a phone number for her she changed it to stop us from contacting the kids...There are no court papers deciding custody and we do not know where to turn for help. Please send me in the right direction... all of the children are under the age of 6 and their father is a good father.. not a deadbeat, or a drunk or a druggie.. and this is killing us. We do not know our rights, nor do we know how to find a good attorney in our area. We also dont know the cost of getting court papers asking for visitation...please. any help is useful...

YOU have no rights, these are not your children.