Concerned Father: We have a verbal agreement on custody

[concernedfather]

My ex and I were never married and she left. We have been sharing custody over the past 2.7 years and our child is 4 now. I have my child 80 to 90% of the time. Our child will spend the nights and days with me 6 or sometimes more days in a row. My ex was previously without a home until a year ago I rented an apt in my complex for her, so she could be close to our child and myself to help create a family atmosphere. As I mentioned she is pretty much absent. Now, the mother has developed a relationship with another man and is moving in with him and roommates who I don't know. I don't know anything about them. And surely don't want them babysitting her. All I know is that the her myspace page seems to be filled with wine, dancing, and good times with friends at bars and clubs. I feel I have sacrificed for our child and have really bonded with her over the years. Now, that the ex is moving to another place (15miles away), i feel that this bond is being attacked. The mother knew she was going to move for several weeks and failed to inform me for fear that I wouldn't approve of our child being in a strange home, with people we don't really know. I know people may think it is jealousy, but I am happy she has found love. However, she has only known these people for about a year and no one, including ex's mother and family know or agree with this move. We've tried to get her to postpone until they can find a place closer to homebase and the school district we've decided upon. She is dertermined and claims I have to trust her. However, I feel the trust in her was violated when she made a decision without consoling me, her family, or our child. This was a quick overview, but I would like to hear what my options may be... We have a verbal agreement on custody, and the state has never been involved.

I have considered moving home(out of state) where there is no financial or social struggles. And my child could have a lot more opportunities... California's too expensive and I have financial freedom and a great job/investments out of state.


Sincerly,

Scared Father

[Gbyte]

Hmm...if you were never married - don't leave the state. My guess is you need to retain an attorney, file for temp emergency custody then start a case for sole custody. You might wait until she moves....

Someone else will probably have better ideas.