Ohio father

[neophish7]

I am a father to a 6 year old girl from wedlock. We have never gone to court, I have always had my daughter 50% of the time and paid for half of everything I also keep insurance on her. Now her mom is trying to get me for child support. I have decided to go to court and try to get full custody. I would like to know reasonably what to expect, and also can she get me for back child support? Also i was told before we go that we can file a temporary injunction to keep the days how they are for now. I do not wanna be a weekend dad, need advice to get my girl as much as I can. My personal info

age 26
fulltime job with medical
own my own car
have a 3 bedroom house (mom has apt.)
have a fiance, college educated also with full time job
no arrests over the age of 18
no neglect abuse etc.
have always taken care of my daughter

[Gbyte]

She files for child support now all of the sudden you want full custody?

Do it for the RIGHT reasons. This isn't the right reason! You will punish your child financially and by the stress on the parents of a custody battle - and yourself - for something that will likely happen anyway (ie schedule stay the same, she will be awarded child support).

If you have some documentation of your current schedule it will likely remain the same (or if you both are truthful and tell the same story it will likely remain the same). Does she want to change parenting times? Or just child support?

If it's just child support, you should go to the hearing with your schedule. You WILL likely pay the standard order minus a small percentage for the amount of time you have your child. You probably make more than her which is why you can afford a 3 bedroom house and her an apartment. They won't hold apartment living against her. It's harder to have two separate homes than to have one intact...and it's more expensive.

And yes, she could get back support. In my county (probably a state level), a court hearing is required to get a judgement on back support.

My recommendation...drop your custody hearing.

If anything, have your lawyer draw up a shared parenting plan with your current schedule to present to her. She can sign it and present it to the courts. At least that way, you have documentation of your time with your child possibly qualifying you for a small discount.

[neophish7]

Im going for full custody bc she seems to be doing everything in her power to punish me. im not trying to split her from her daughter but I kinda figured do it first bc the way shes been acting it seems like shell try to do the same to me. Shes already trying to say that I cant have her on thursdays anymore. I dont wanna give up my days and I also dont feel as though I owe her anything bc I take care of half and a lotta times more. No way in hell will she willingly sign a shared parenting plan.

[Gbyte]

Custody court is NOT fun and you MIGHT get less then you get now.

Just because the ex appears to be punishing you is not good grounds for full custody.

You might as well get your plan drawn up with a lawyer - for shared parenting, as full custody is NOT likely and I don't think you should be awarded it anyways without good cause.

If you DO NOT submit a shared parenting plan...and she doesn't either, then full custody will likely be awarded to one or the other and it is often the mother. Then you may get standard schedule which is 1 evening a week and every other weekend (in most ohio counties - it does vary). A lawyer could help guide you more on this.

It would be in your best interest if you want to be a large part of your childs life to get one drawn up and propose it FIRST - don't have her served in an adverserial (SP???) fashion. Custody court IS expensive and you will likely loose your bid for full custody - taking away money that could be spent on your childs behalf from BOTH parents. If she says NO WAY IN H*** to your plan, you'll have it all ready when the courts ask for it.

You WILL pay child support unless she makes a LOT more than you (than you still would...just not as much). Even on a 50/50 custody if she makes less (which I think are good solutions in a rare few cases). Estimate her income. How much is child care? Start to pay 100% of it. This will lower your monthly child support cost (as far as the state is concerned) and that expense will disappear or minimize when school starts. Someone chime in if they've had different experiences with this.

Get shared parenting drawn up...get child support estimates drawn up. Get used to it...child support is coming. If she knows she can get help with expenses - again, it is more expensive to maintain two homes and she does put a roof over your childs head too - and keep the schedule the same (or similar), It might work.

You really don't want to go to custody court without a really good reason. Without exhausting every other effort FIRST. IT SUCKS! Really it does...

[tbyte]

neophish7,
First, I understand why you are interested in seeking full custody. You should not be required to pay substantial child support on a child who is already living with you 50% of the time.
Please answer some questions for me, and I can give you an idea of what to ask for, what to settle for, and what to expect.
You say your child was born from wedlock. Are you still legally married?
If you are not married, why was child custody and child support not settled at the time of the divorce?
How long have you been separated?
What are the relative incomes of you and the mother?
What State do you live in?

[neophish7]

Tbyte,


Mother and I were never married. We never had to settle in court bc it never came to that. Ive always provided well and so has she. We have been seperated at least 5 years. We did live together for a while. We make about the same I would say at around 25k a year gross. Is my live in fiance going to present a problem. Thanks for your help...


Tristan

[tbyte]

Where did you get the idea that you never had to settle in court? It was absolutely necessary that you go to court to establish paternal rights.
In most U.S. States, if you are the father of a child born out of wedlock have NO rights to the child at all. The mother has full and total custody by default.
Where you to go back to court tomorrow to get this settled, the court would begin with the assumption that the mother will be the custodial parent, you will be the non-custodial parent with default visitation, and you will be paying full child support. To get a better arrangement, possibly up to a 50/50 shared parenting plan, you are going to needs LOTS of evidence of your involvement and support of the child.
School records, documents from doctor's visits, receipts for clothing and other expenses, etc. You are going to need to show that she has been under your physical and financial care, and that it is in her best interest for this to continue.
You are NOT going to get full custody. 50/50 shared parenting is what you should shoot for, and even that will be an uphill climb.
On the matter of child support, what are the relative incomes of you and the mother. What are your educational backgrounds and career experience?

[MPLW]

I think I may be able to help you. I work for McNair Petroff, LLC, a small firm in downtown Columbus, and have seen many people in a situation similar to yours. I would definitely recommend for you to check out our website at McNair Petroff : Central, Columbus, Ohio Attorneys Lawyers Representation Legal to review your options, or to call our office. We are available Mon-Fri 8:30 to 5:30 PM. Our clients expect prompt, attentive, quality legal work -- and we provide it both efficiently and cost-effectively. Best of luck!