visitation rights violated... complicated

well here another side I hope for all you scumsucking DAD's...

So after playing games with support for 6 years and still owing money you guys have the nerve to want a change to support after your children turn 21! Ok...so what do I do now??? Throw the child out...a child who maintains a GPA of 3.8 in a pharmacy program ....so do I ask her to work even though she has to maintain this average on a scholarship because her dad doesn't want to pay for any college? WHAT...YOU F-----!! What do you want us to do now??? Please someone tel me..I would like to know how to support this child now when I already work three different jobs just to keep our heads above water....

Scumsucking sons of *****es...then you expect your children to respect you as well....oh ok!!

well disgusted mom ... i don't know why your griping your situation to me and calling me a scumsucking father ... i'm sorry if your ex isn't doing the right thing, but what does that have to do with me?
i looked up the figures ... there are 3 million cases of child support in my state. out of those half are current , half are dilinquent. in my case i was unemployed over a year ... while the courts will grant you a temporary lowering, when i found work it went right back to what it was, plus they put me in arrears .. we're talking about 10 g's in arrears .. ok, i'll do what the court says, no choice in that, but is that fair? i think not, i shouldn't have to pay what i wasn't earning .... so i'm in arrears .. i pay it off an extra 100 a week .... do i deserve to called a bum and scumsucking father for trying to do the right thing?
for 12 years i sacrificed .. i sacrificed my time, my personal life was put on a shelf, inever had any money for the things i wanted to do because with child support, with having them every other weekend , it doesn't leave much money or time left for myself .. 12 years, no complaints, i did what i had to do ...
so you have no right .. none at all to judge us fathers who are doing the best we can .... if it were up to half you bitter moms you would leave us living in cardboard box on the street, while you take all our money .. sorry lady ain't happening ... as much as you hate to see it, we will survive.....
furthermore .. our obligation ends at 21 .. if i can help my kids with college i will, but chances are i won't be able to. does that make me a bad person? my parents didn't help me with college, i worked my way through ... were my parents bad? heck no .... don't curse him for your expectations .... he did what he had to do .. and now it's over, he can do for himself .. if she can't take care of herself at 21 that's sad ....

oh so you only had every other weekend for yourself...POOR THING!!! what about every day of our lives...we deal with the kids believe me I wouldn't have it any other way but I don't put my time up like you do...I am their mom and that is that. BUT ....so at 21 your obligation is over.,..what about mine...do I kick the kids out now because I still have to feed them? Should I kick out my daughter who maintains a 4.0 average at college because now she should work?? YOU FATHERS...YES YOU SUCK!!!! What a f....n attitude!!!that 's why your kids don't talk to you....

oh so you only had every other weekend for yourself...POOR THING!!! what about every day of our lives...we deal with the kids believe me I wouldn't have it any other way but I don't put my time up like you do...I am their mom and that is that. BUT ....so at 21 your obligation is over.,..what about mine...do I kick the kids out now because I still have to feed them? Should I kick out my daughter who maintains a 4.0 average at college because now she should work?? YOU FATHERS...YES YOU SUCK!!!! What a f....n attitude!!!that 's why your kids don't talk to you....


listen disgruntled mom ... you are talking about apples and i am talking about oranges. our experiences couldn't be more different.

In my case i'm a dad who is doing what he is supposed to do. maintain a home for myself adequate enough to have my 3 children sleep over, and when they do, provide food and entertainment. I try to involved as much as i can in children's life. and I pay my child support. in my case i had 3 kids by two women ... that's 25% of my salary for the oldests two mom and 17% to the mom of my youngest. I get no tax credit for any of it the way custodial moms do. and my support isn't even considered income so theat's tax free for them. not to mention the extra cash of covering them on my insurance. would it kill the government to give men who have remained current for the year on thier support, a small tax credit ? can't i deduct that new bunkbed i had to buy for the kids? no instead, i get my bank accounts frozen and my licenses threatened because i had the audacity to get laid off from my job and fall behind in payments.
I've had to deal with a spiteful ex-wife who if it weren't for complaining about me, would have no life. who has tried to influence my children against me for 12 years now. who gave me as little information and co-operation as possible.
and that the mom's get the kids automatically is a farce too. i would have given anything to tuck my kids in every night, to help them with thier homework every night, live life with them every day, not be a separate every other weekend life. i could have raised them too, and it would have been a pleasure. but i was denied that by " the system" so don't complain about having them through thier daily lives .. i would have given my right arm for that.

and while i express my displeasure for the system, i can say proudly that i've done my best at what i've had to do. i was part of children's lives. I believe i'm entitled to a modicum of acknowledgement and respect for being the best dad i could be under hard circumstances. leastways i believe i should have a legal right to see my 16 year old child. that part of the system needs fixing.

as for you, your situation is much different. the father of your child abandoned her. I abhore that type of behavior. not only for the heartbreak he causes his daughter, but because of scumbags like him, that's exactly why these laws are so tough, they even punish the decent dads. believe me ma'am, i'm all for throwing the book at this guy. i'd also like to say , as i'm a proud parent, you should be too . you raised your daughter without that SOB, and she turned out great didn't she ... i salute you.

and by the way ... yes 21 is old enough that your daughter should be working at least part time. my sister's , my son, my nephews an d nieces all worked through college and did fine. i've been working since i'm 16. if they stay in school, should we be obligated to take care of them until thier in thier 30's.

and i gotta say ... you obviously have deep bitterness and hatred in your heart caused by this man ... that's never good ... you should seek psychiatric help, and i'll pray that someday god lifts the anger in your soul.

I feel for you and this situation, but it is not just father's rights that are violated. My ex has custody of my now 5 yr old daughter because he kidnapped her before there was a custody agreement in place and has been trying to turn her against me ever since. It's been hell because it's so hard to prove and so hard to get anyone to listen.