Best way to lower child support payment

[Dre]

I have a case where 9 years ago I did not show up for a DNA test so automatically the child was said to be mine. There is a child support order in place through the attorney generals office, which I am getting caught up on. But the child's mother will not let me have visitation rights, even though its in the order for me to have visitation. I am about to file contempt, to see her but what about DNA test?

[l23]

Dear unregistered,

"You should be ashamed of yourself. It is selfish and inconsiderate to try to cheat that woman out of money that she needs and is entitled too just because you feel that it is too much. As you stated, she is on welfare and has no job. Maybe you need to look into getting yourself a second job before you try to cheat other people and the state. If you do this to the custodial mother, what makes you think that he won't do it to you if your relationship doesn't work out. Treat other the way you would want to be treated."




You should be ashamed of yourself obviously you have never been in this situation. May I also add that you are to suggest advice and not your opinion! Also have you ever seen the rates they set upon men who pay child support??? Some men have become homeless...so what are we saying that one person is more important than another? Single women with children have plenty of opportunities for help more so than single men struggling with large child support payments. Get off your high horse and go join a group if you need to vent!!

[mystical45]

Originally Posted by l23 Dear unregistered, "You should be ashamed of yourself. It is selfish and inconsiderate to try to cheat that woman out of money that she needs and is entitled too just because you feel that it is too much. As you stated, she is on welfare and has no job. Maybe you need to look into getting yourself a second job before you try to cheat other people and the state. If you do this to the custodial mother, what makes you think that he won't do it to you if your relationship doesn't work out. Treat other the way you would want to be treated." You should be ashamed of yourself obviously you have never been in this situation. May I also add that you are to suggest advice and not your opinion! Also have you ever seen the rates they set upon men who pay child support??? Some men have become homeless...so what are we saying that one person is more important than another? Single women with children have plenty of opportunities for help more so than single men struggling with large child support payments. Get off your high horse and go join a group if you need to vent!!

The child support rates that the NCP pays is done by a child support worksheet and set up by state mandated child support guidelines. It is based on several factors, income, medical expenses, day care expenses, in some states NCP can get credit for how many days out of the month they visit with the child.
Now, your hypocritical advice of "go join a group if you need to vent" is rather laughable and quite amusing since you just "vented" in your post, you offered no facts whatsoever, just your opinion.

[tiredstepmom]

Why should she get a second job to make up for piece of trash he reproduced with prior to meeting her? I am in the same boat the mother refuses to work and gets food stamps plus half his check. She still insists on more money and sends the kids over to our house with tattered clothing forcing us to buy more only so she can throw it away or give it away to the other wellfare mothers in her family. When the split he GAVE her his truck and move out of his house so she and her kids could have a home and transportation she even demands to use MY car when service is required on her vehicle. At first we tried giving her everything she asked for because she kept feeding the kids BS about not paying support now she just demands and tells me how I need to run MY home. He does not have enough money to even pay his rent I pick up most of the slack because she will not do her part. She says its easier for us to make it because she doesn't work I have lost a home and filed for bankruptcy trying to give these kids a better life while she just wastes there support checks. This woman is trying to protect HER child from poverty this other woman should work she is not cheating her out of anything. I am so disgusted with women in general since dealing with all this child support drama the system is not fair to fathers at all.

[Also screwed]

Originally Posted by tiredstepmom Why should she get a second job to make up for piece of trash he reproduced with prior to meeting her? I am in the same boat the mother refuses to work and gets food stamps plus half his check. She still insists on more money and sends the kids over to our house with tattered clothing forcing us to buy more only so she can throw it away or give it away to the other wellfare mothers in her family. When the split he GAVE her his truck and move out of his house so she and her kids could have a home and transportation she even demands to use MY car when service is required on her vehicle. At first we tried giving her everything she asked for because she kept feeding the kids BS about not paying support now she just demands and tells me how I need to run MY home. He does not have enough money to even pay his rent I pick up most of the slack because she will not do her part. She says its easier for us to make it because she doesn't work I have lost a home and filed for bankruptcy trying to give these kids a better life while she just wastes there support checks. This woman is trying to protect HER child from poverty this other woman should work she is not cheating her out of anything. I am so (disgusted with women in general since dealing with all this child support drama the system is not fair to fathers at all.

AMEN!!!!!

[mystical45]

Originally Posted by tiredstepmom Why should she get a second job to make up for piece of trash he reproduced with prior to meeting her? I am in the same boat the mother refuses to work and gets food stamps plus half his check. She still insists on more money and sends the kids over to our house with tattered clothing forcing us to buy more only so she can throw it away or give it away to the other wellfare mothers in her family. When the split he GAVE her his truck and move out of his house so she and her kids could have a home and transportation she even demands to use MY car when service is required on her vehicle. At first we tried giving her everything she asked for because she kept feeding the kids BS about not paying support now she just demands and tells me how I need to run MY home. He does not have enough money to even pay his rent I pick up most of the slack because she will not do her part. She says its easier for us to make it because she doesn't work I have lost a home and filed for bankruptcy trying to give these kids a better life while she just wastes there support checks. This woman is trying to protect HER child from poverty this other woman should work she is not cheating her out of anything. I am so disgusted with women in general since dealing with all this child support drama the system is not fair to fathers at all.

You did know he had children prior to you marrying and becomming involved with him, yes? You should not be dealing with any "child support drama" quite frankly its none of your business, its between the father and the mother of the children.

[mystical45]

Originally Posted by Also screwed AMEN!!!!!

I have zero sympathy for whining step parents about child support, how much their spouse has to pay how much the CP wants and on and on. You know going into the relationship your partner had children, therefore an underlying exist for support was there and would remain there until the child/children are age of majority. We have child support laws in place because it is recognized that children need to be supported by both parents. If you think what is sent in cs supports a child fully, you are clueless.

[tiredstepmom]

who said sympathy? Are you not reading? She was provided with a home and a vehicle she retained medical insurance. She took the child support , left the houseabandoned and movef the kids over an hour away to live in a hotel part time the other time 3 kids and mom all in one room. We do not care that half the incomme goes to her there are three children the issue is that she is not using the money on the kids. She refuses to work although hes payd for her schooling. We have paid more then our fair share for over three years allowing her to get her life together because the children need both parents in there lives. All you read is that we assume the CS support payment is enough to raise a child, not this is that the mother assumes that the money is for HER and since we both work we should pay for all the extras on top of not caring for the children properly she refuses to allow them to visit based around her moods.

STFU no ones complaining about providing for the kids our issue is she needs to do her part if she took the CS she had and just had a basic 10/hr job the kids wouldnt be living like this.

Sitting at home collecting a check is not raising a child BOTTOM LINE. Lazy bitter used up women like her are only hurting there own. In the end he will neeed to step in an take custody there goes her pay check until she gets fer life together.

[someguy]

These posts are funny. The law states that if there is another child, CS will be lowered according to the guidelines. No child takes precedence over another. As far as I am concerned, get rid of welfare. The mother will die of starvation or will have to get off her fat a$$ and work. As for CS, the mans new family should not be penalized for anothers unwillingness to work. That means no second job for mans new wife to assist in CS payments.

One other thing, stepparents do have a say in CS matters. The income that is generated by the new spouse is often considered in the household income. Women (mostly) stop being greedy.

[someguy]

Originally Posted by Unfair My two cents: I am a male, 27. I'm in a very small minority in my situation, I'm sure. I was essentially date raped, then sued. I pay $1006 a month in child support for a woman that forced herself on me. She lives with her mother in a huge house, and her mother babysits for her. She has no rent, no heat bill, no child care bill, nothing. I, meanwhile, worked my ass off to get through college while working three part time jobs to pay for support which at the time was around $400 per month. When I graduated I was sued for my current $1006. Courts don't listen to reason or pay any attention to the situation, it goes by the book regardless of what the circumstances are. I lost my car, got evicted from my apartment, and am now living with friends and driving a car that was given to me for free. When I buy a new shirt or shoes for work, it comes out of my food budget, which is currently about $10.00 per day. Now christmas is coming up and my whole family is getting a cheezy bucket of popcorn because I'm flat broke. Needless to say I'm furious at the Michigan government for screwing me over like this, even more mad at the mother for taking advantage of this system, and at a loss on what I can do to make things better. Now the economy is getting rough and my situation is just getting worse. I guess I just wanted to share my story, and maybe someone out there has an idea of what I could do to improve my situation?

Originally Posted by tbyte Unfortunately, Michigan has the worst reputation among all the states for fairly treating fathers in family court. Her personal circumstances and expenses are irrelevant to the calculation of child support. Have you checked an online child support calculator for Michigan to get an idea of what your support assessment should be?

The judge has to go by the support guidelines unless he has a damn good reason not too. This situation, which is common all over the country is why so many men don't even bother trying to pay. Paying a good attorney $500 could stop alot of your mes. Its pretty easy.