What are my chances?

This is a discussion on What are my chances? within the Child Custody & Support forum, part of the FAMILY LAW, DIVORCE, CUSTODY category; 3 years ago I filed for divorce and soon after, she told me she was pregnant. I told her that ...

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Old May 21st, 2008, 11:36 PM   #1
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Default What are my chances?

3 years ago I filed for divorce and soon after, she told me she was pregnant. I told her that I wanted a paternity test, which she refused to do until recently- due to a court order.
She did not call me when she had the baby. After he was born, she only let me see him twice and then moved out of the state.
I have been paying child support through DCS since she cut all communication with me, and now that we are sure that he is mine, I want to be in my son's life.
I have since remarried. My wife has a son from a previous relationship who calls me dad. We've talked about it, and we agree that we would love to have him with us as much as possible.
I don't have the means to frequently fly out to see my son.
I'm supposed to come up with some kind of parenting plan, but where do you start when the child is only 2 years old?
My ex is one of those vindictive women who will lie and manipulate everyone she can. and now that i have 'a new family' i know that she will only make things harder on me.
Will missouri courts give me a shot to be a good father even though i haven't been a part of his life? Will I ever get to see my son? What should I propose as a schedule for the parenting plan?
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Old May 22nd, 2008, 04:22 AM   #2
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Default Re: What are my chances?

Single Parents, - StepBySteps please visit this ite for step by step parentig plan

Emery's Alternative Parenting Plans (Child Custody Schedules)

Toddlers: Eighteen Months to Three Years
Traditional Options for an Angry Divorce
Every Saturday from 2:00 p.m. until 6:00 p.m. Overnight until 10:00 a.m. on alternate Sundays
Every other weekend from 2:00 p.m. on Saturday, with an overnight until 11:00 a.m. on Sunday. Alternate Monday evenings from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. on the Monday following the weekend spent with the residential parent.
More Integrated Options for a Distant Divorce
Every Saturday from 9:00 a.m. until 5:00 p.m., including a nap. Overnight until 9:00 a.m. on alternate Sundays. Every Wednesday evening from 4:30 p.m. until 6:30 p.m.
Closely Integrated Options for a Cooperative Divorce
Every Saturday from 10:00 a.m. until 10:00 a.m. Sunday. Every Monday and Wednesday evening from 4:30 p.m. until 7:30 p.m.; some contact/feeding/bedtime takes place at residential parent’s home.
Two weekdays from 1:00 p.m. until 5:00 p.m. (substituting for child care); every Friday from 1:00 p.m. until 12:00 p.m. on Saturday.

Last edited by Littleacres; May 22nd, 2008 at 04:49 AM. Reason: updte
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Old May 22nd, 2008, 09:43 PM   #3
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Default Re: What are my chances?

You obviously will not be able to do a weekly schedule due to your distance from the child.
It would be traumatic for a 2 year old child to be separated from his mother for any extended period of time, since he would not have an established relationship with you. So propose summertime visits where you drive out to see him for a week or two and have the opportunity to take him for day trips during that time. Also request the right to see him over alternate holidays.
Build into your proposal expanded rights of visitation as the child gets older, including visits to your home over summer and alternate holidays as the child reaches six years of age. By building these in right now, you will not need to go back to court every three or four years.
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